All Emoji Meanings & Pictures - The Ultimate Emoji List

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Captain Stelgart held tightly to the 'oh shit bars' on the side of her command couch, the lights flickering on the bridge as her 'little' frigate took a small section of the nCv cannons fired by the Harvester that was breaking orbit from around the gas giant. Sure, it was only a 'fraction' of the guns in that salvo, but when the array firing that salvo was measured in the tens of miles rather than by the barrel, the concept of 'only a fraction' became largely moot.
"No damage! Cycling out projectors in section 9-G! Hull integrity is still nominal," her DCC officer called out.
It was worth it as the little frigate and its brigade mates came out of the maelstrom of hellfire, still tightly interlocked in formation, guns still hot.
"TARGET LOCK!" Guns called out.
Stelgart heard Rear Admiral (Lower Decks) call it out and gave her own input.
"OPEN FIRE!" she yelled.
The frigate shuddered as the fireplan was activated. The massive C+ cannons fired, rotated barrels, loaded a ground-car sized slug, and fired again, each of the six guns spitting out a C+ round every fifteen seconds. The inverted tachyon particle beams ripped out, transferring almost instantly across the hundreds of kilometers to impact almost before the C+ shells. The frigate flushed its missile pods, the pod itself turning into a C+ slug, and dumped more out. The creation engines ran overtime, producing a shell every second and a missile pod every five seconds, the heat rising rapidly.
The Harvester being targeted took hits from the entire brigade across the engines. The C+ shells hit inside the shields, detonating inside the engine spaces, which were not protected by the armobattlescreen/armor technolaminate like the hull.
Over a third of the engines went out or exploded. The rear battlescreen failed, lightning bolts the size of trains ripping across the hull of the Harvester, tearing huge canyons in the armor.
"Fireplan updating!" Guns called out. "Decoys out!"
Stelgart felt the ship slide to the side as it warped space around it, the 'little' frigate's mass sliding into the warped gravity well it was projecting to move rapidly. The entire brigade moved like a flock of birds, each one's engines supplementing the engines of the others, allowing them to move quickly and smoothly through space.
The Harvester's return shots whipped through space where the brigade had been, hitting nothing but echoes of the ships that were a hundred kilometers away. The decoys that survived spun up to full power and 'fired' off. Dozens, hundreds of ship profiles and energy signals scattered from the target area, completely obscuring the small flotilla of two dozen 'light attack' ships as they changed targets to the undamaged engines and maneuvered for a better shot.
"HELLCORE CHARGING!" Guns called out.
General No'Drak heard the call, preceded by "STATUS CHANGE" from the ground-side tactical analysis teams.
Ge'ermo'o turned around, his hooves thumping on the variable hardness flooring. He looked down at the large hologram of the planet. The thirty or so icons representing the more massive Precursor machines were starting to flash, alerting those who were reading the map that they had changed their activities and demanded attention.
"Precursor ships are engaging engines and starting to lift off," someone else called out.
Only the lemurs of Terra could break a machine's will to fight, Ge'ermo'o thought. Two hours ago that realization would have filled him with horror.
Now, it was just one more shock and horror piled upon everything he had witnessed.
White filled a holotank as Third Armor gutted another Precursor ship, turning the superstructure into fuel for the fusion hellfire the consumed it. The feed cleared and the recon drones and sats focused on how the battlesteel of the Precursor machine was burning like anthracite coal exposed to plasma.
You murdered and terrorized your way across the Rim Systems and now that someone can hit back you scurry away like insects. I hope the Terrans destroy every one of you butchers and that you feel every moment of it, Ge'ermo'o thought, completely unaware of the irony of a Lanaktallan thinking such things.
The floor rumbled slightly even though the blast was nearly a hundred miles away.
Die, Ge'ermo'o thought, his tendrils curling with anger. Don't say goodbye, just die, Precursor trash.
An aide touched General No'Drak's arm. The big insectoid shifted, pulling Ge'ermo'o's attention from the holotanks.
"Sir, 108th MI has a data pull request from Sergeant Casey," the aide said.
It took Ge'ermo'o a moment to remember who Sergeant Casey was, and his eyes went to the holotank that was tracking the subterranean progress of the massive Precursor mining machine.
"Tell me," No'Drak sighed, pulling out another cigarette. He was highly stressed. The weapons being used shredded atmospheric gases, blew holes in the planet's magnetic field, and shattered the ozone layer. The weapons were "Total War" option weapons.
You usually didn't use them on a planet you planned on having anyone live on before an Elven Court or Genesis Device could be used.
They'd been used on Unified Council military targets prior, the Mar-gite before that.
Now they were being used to show the Precursors that the Terrans still had the ability to hurt them.
"MI reports Casey filed a data pull request for an older creation engine template," the aide said, combing her whiskers with one slightly trembling hand. "It's a problem."
"What's the problem?" General No'Drak asked. Part of him wanted to snap at his aide, ask her why she was bringing a request from a Senior NCO to him instead of gong to his Company Commander.
A glance at the holotank showing the progress of the Precursor mining machine heading toward the mountains along a path miles below the surface reminded him that he wasn't dealing with some Private asking to use the latrine.
"The request was very specific, but not something in our decrypted and active template data archives," the aide said. "Current network and mainframe usage rates mean it could take a couple of hours for even one of the BOLO's to find the correct files in their archives since it's going be a low priority file."
"Anyone else who might have something like it?" General No'Drak asked.
"There is someone in-system we can ask, but..." the aide went silent for a long moment.
"Spit it out. Who?" No'Drak lit his cigarette as another Precursor machine was gutted, the city sized bulk falling a half mile into the ocean, still burning.
"The Crusade of Wrath likely has the template loaded in systems that they can datamine a lot faster," the aide said.
Ge'ermo'o opened his mouth to ask the question, but General No'Drak beat him to it.
"What is he asking for?" the big Treana'ad asked, putting away his pack.
The aide consulted her dataslate. "A set of Second Terran/Mantid War creation engine templates for, and I quote, 'M-428e9 High Frequency Phasic Scrambler' and 'High Frequency Phasic Disruption Munitions in the multi-spectrum range'. Both sets are real old, we're talking archive databanks old."
"How would he know of such things?" Ge'ermo'o asked.
"Aside from being like nine hundred years old? It's a pretty big piece of history for our people," General No'Drak mused. "He's probably seen it referenced in manuals and documentaries and history works."
"Sir, should I contact the Crusade of Wrath?" the aide asked.
Smokey No nodded. "Get me Joan Mentissa," he said, exhaling smoke around his feet.
Ge'ermo'o stared at the holotank as another Precursor made it to orbit, its hull burning, only to run face first into the ships of the Crusade of Wrath, which began pounding it with their guns even as it tried to get clear of the gravity well to safely make a helljump.
The holotank in front of him wavered then cleared, to show an archaically designed ship's bridge, all black metal with dark green, blue, and red markings. No hologram projectors there, only bulky looking flat screens. The crews at the stations ranged from female Terrans in heavy armor to rough looking, almost skeletal appearing full conversion cyborgs. The well lit bridge still seemed to give off the aura of being dimly lit, shadowed, and hidden due to some dark purpose.
"General," the Joan said, nodding. "How may the Dark Crusade of Light assist you?"
"We believe there may be justification to deploy ancient technology only you would be in possession of," General No'Drak said carefully. "Technology that we require the creation engine templates for."
"What type of technology?" the Terran woman asked, narrowing her eyes slightly. "The Crusade possesses many forgotten and forbidden technologies. Be wary with what you ask, General."
"High frequency phasic interrupter technology," No'Drak said. "We have reason to believe there is a statistically insignificant but still valid change of encountering Precursor War Era Mantid technology," No'Drak said.
She turned, her mouth blurring slightly as the audio cut out. After a moment she nodded and turned back to General No'Drak.
"We have such technology templates," the Joan stated. "We shall transmit Terran Imperium Era templates as well as Combined Military Authority templates to your people."
The lights on the deck of the ship flashed around the Joan and she turned away.
"I have a battle to fight, General, and the enemies of life to destroy. May you seek honor," she said.
The channel closed.
Ge'ermo'o swallowed around the lump in both his long and short throats.
"What is the technology do?"
Casey looked up at Vuxten, his armored breathing mask making him look strange to Vuxten's eyes.
"Sorry, what, sir?" he asked, turning his attention from the holographic wireframe projected by Addox's hand to Vuxten.
"What does the tech do? Even my greenie isn't sure," Vuxten said.
Casey tapped the hologram as if it was a physical thing. "It's old tech. There's civilian versions, but those are the size of small spaceships, designed to cover entire cities in an interlocking field, we need smaller ones, ones that can handle the punishment of combat."
"OK, but what does it do?" Vuxten asked.
"It's a high frequency phasic disruptor," Casey said. Before Vuxten could comment that he had heard that but it didn't explain what it did, Casey pointed at a small scaffolding walkway. "We've got overwhelming evidence that this is a Mantid machine, and I doubt it's from Premik-8. That means our greenies run the risk of being hit by ruling or warrior caste psychic attacks."
Vuxten nodded even as 471 flashed icons of disgust.
"These were designed just prior to the Second Mantid War," Casey said. He finished tapping icons and wrapped the object he was modifying in the hologram in a casing. "They won't do much more than make our little green buddies itch, maybe a light headache, but it completely disrupts psychic control signals from upper caste."
The nano-forge attached to Casey's heavy loading/work chassis began to hiss, the untold trillions of nanites contained inside building the template Casey had modified.
"These are Imperium make. I used the Combine circuitry, the Imperium disruptors, and wrapped it in warsteel, which can hold and disrupt psychic energies," Casey said. He grabbed the small cylinder as it exited the creation engine, waved it a second to cool it down, and moved over to Addox. "We attach one of these to each armor, we crank the detection up, and if there is any type of upper caste Mantids running around, they can't force our little buddies to do anything."
--i die free-- 840 transmitted. Icons from every other greenie flashed in agreement.
Vuxten watched as Casey used a fusion torch to attach two different types of cylinders to Addox's armor. One was round with a flat side, the other was a hexagon. Both had green lights down the side.
--ouchie-- 471 transmitted to Vuxten.
"You OK, buddy?" Vuxten asked on the private channel.
--tingly achey-- 471 replied. --taste like copper vapor--
"It's going to be thick when they cut in if our buddies get hit," Casey said, moving to Vuxten. "From here on out, our battle buddies need to stay in the shells, especially if we end up deploying the munitions."
Vuxten nodded, looking at the grenade on his harness that Casey had handed out. It had the Confederate logo of a hand crushing a planet on it, but it seemed older, somehow malevolent, just sitting there.
"Try not to shoot random robots you see. Most of them will be extremely task oriented," Addox said. "More than likely they won't even be able to process your existence beyond being some kind of obstacle to move around."
Everyone nodded as Vuxten felt a slight twinge in his head, a couple of inches behind between his eyes.
"Right now, they're set to stealth," Casey said, moving to the next person in line. "The Crusade was nice enough to give us the specs and they had a stealth mode in the templates they handed off, just needed a little tweaking to work with our systems."
Vuxten closed his eyes for a second as a mention of the Crusade made the taste of Gen-0 stimgum rise up in his mouth and the scar around his cyberear ached for a long moment.
He could remember the fear and rage of the Imperium/Crusade/Combine troops landing on Telkan in the middle of an all out assault by the Dwellerspawn creatures and plants upon a shelter that had undergone an emergency surfacing.
"Your vitals just spiked, Lieutenant, are you all right?" Addox asked.
Vuxten swallowed. "I'm all right. Just reminded me of something."
"Second Telkan War?" Addox asked.
"Yeah," Vuxten said.
"You were there when the Imperium troops made their landing, right?" Addox said.
--no shit-- 471 said privately.
"You could say that," Vuxten replied.
I AM ENTIRELY FORMED OF WRATH! echoed in his mind, along with the memory of a huge Terran wading into the Dwellerspawn.
Vuxten waited, consciously taking control of his breathing to keep it steady and reciting the mantras he had been taught. A couple of times his datalink tossed up memes, but they were all pretty bad, pretty basic ones, which told him he was either out of range of the main psyops system or it was overloaded.
One got through that made him laugh, even though it obviously wasn't meant for him, which made it even funnier.
A heavy tank with markings of Bravo Company, 6-28 Armored Battalion had obviously driven into a large ditch and broken its tracks, tried to back up, slid sideways and left its tracks bunched up before somehow having the cupola jump its track and having then gotten stuck on its side. A green mantid was in the foreground with a commo headset on saying "Have you tried turning it off and on?"
"What?" Private First Class Sultrek asked, making Vuxten aware he'd laughed over the platoon leader channel.
"Fighting must be easing up on the surface," Vuxten said. He passed around the meme and everyone laughed.
Vuxten saw Casey shake his head. "Not gonna work, they're gonna need to release the IP and acquire a new one."
--try running a network ping-- 884 offered.
--diagnostics on my board says your tank is fine please clear channel-- 737 informed the tank in the picture.
--must be a factory defect-- 013 decided.
Another meme popped in, obviously from 3rd Armor Divisions Morale section and Vuxten burst out laughing as Casey attached another set of disruptors.
This one was of a Precursor with "ONLY ENOUGH FOR ONE" written on its hull, staring with wide eyes at another Precursor that was completely engulfed in the white fire of an uncontrolled fusion reaction. The one with wide eyes slowly went transparent as it slid off the side of the picture. The caption read "When see your boy get roasted by another squad and realize you're next."
"It's an older meme, but it checks out," Casey chuckled.
"I've never seen it," Pvt Renklant said.
Addox shook his head. "That's a genuine Pre-Diasporia meme right there, boys."
The link cut out and Vuxten could see "No Connection" on the BATTACNET icon.
Addox filled the time while Casey attached the parts onto the armor telling a series of profane jokes that made the tip of Vuxten's ear heat up with embarrassment. It was over two dozen jokes that involved a greased up Rigellian body building midget and a pair of confused cat boys. Vuxten knew it was supposed to be jokes but they were so shocking he couldn't even laugh.
Ranklant snickered though.
"All right, done," Casey said, straightening up. His frame hissed as pressure relieved in the heavy pistons that provided strength enhancement.
"Everyone ready?" Vuxten asked, more to Casey than to anyone else.
Icons flashed ready as Casey nodded.
"Lead the way, Sergeant," Second Lieutenant Plunex said.
"All right, let's move out," Sergeant Addox ordered. "Casey, take the rear."
There was silence on the channels as the platoon moved through the larger maintenance tunnels, following the maps made by the recon drones. The drones had found what looked like engines as well as massive fusion plants that provided power but both of those possible targets had been set aside by the very obvious target.
In the heart of the machine was a huge egg shaped area that the doors were closed, the vents did not access, and there was no access outside of what appeared to be airlocks designed for Mantids.
Big Mantids.
It took nearly two hours to navigate the large area before they reached the heavy airlock door. When they got there Addox ordered it cut open but Casey shook his head.
"What?" Vuxten asked.
"Need a greenie to check this seal. It's got some pebbling, looks age related. Might give us an idea of the last time this door was used," Casey said.
--will do-- 471 said.
"My buddy says he'll do it," Vuxten said. He half expected someone to object because he was the ranking officer and was grateful when nobody said anything.
471 popped the armored housing, climbing out and jumping over to Casey's frame, hanging off of it for a second.
"Visual only, don't touch it," Casey said.
--not tell you how to be ape-- 471 shot back.
Casey just chuckled.
After a moment 471 moved back into the shell, sliding his bladearm into the computing node built in. He ran the tensile strength and other factors.
--356 years approx-- 471 let Vuxten know, feeling a glow of pleasure in figuring it out. His fellow Mantids stuck their tongues out at him via emoji for getting the be the one who did the work.
"It's been awhile," Addox mused. "Hopefully there isn't a surprise on the other side of the door," he looked at Lieutenant Plunex. "Orders, sir?"
"Open the door," Plunex said, managing to keep himself from looking to Lieutenant Vuxten for guidance.
"Casey, handle the door," Addox said.
"Roger that," Casey said. He worked for a few moments to get the control panel off, examining it. "No power. Probably controlled from inside," he mused. He pulled wire out of the creation engine, ran it from his frame to the door, and toggled the power.
The door slowly ground opened, moving more smoothly by the time it was halfway open.
"We're going to have to divide up to go through that airlock unless you want me to cut open the far door and risk this thing's systems going full breach alert," Casey said.
"We'll move through by three man groups," Addox said. He looked a Plunex. "First three, sir?"
Plunex felt the sweat break out under his fur. "Uh," he started.
Vuxten stepped forward. "Casey, me, and Private Renklant," he said.
Plunex felt relief even though the idea of putting a superior officer in danger bothered him slightly.
Casey handed the wires to Plunex and walked in, pulling the panel off the door and starting to work on jumping the power leads. Vuxten waited for Renklant to move through then moved through himself. When saw Renklant reach down to take his weapon off of safe Vuxten reached out and put his hand on the weapon.
"Not yet," Vuxten said over the point to point link. "Go in ready, but not hair trigger. Move to the right."
Renklant nodded, swallowing, as Casey stepped back, the wiring bypass ready.
"Close the outer door," Vuxten ordered. He closed his eyes as the massive door hissed shut, taking a deep breath and centering himself. When he opened it Casey stood by the door, staring at Vuxten, simply waiting.
"Open the door," Vuxten ordered. He felt loose but ready to move in any direction, not on edge but ready to react with his weapon at any second.
The door slid open and Casey stepped in, taking a step straight into the room beyond and Vuxten knew it was to clear the firing arc for the big minigun the human was packing. Vuxten went left, rifle in his hands, thumb on the fire selector.
The entire sphere was open. Work stations covering the walls and a massive computer core suspended in the middle of the room with what looked like some kind of horseshoe shaped command console wrapped around it. Heavy cabling was festooned everywhere, over consoles, across chairs, in mid-air as it moved from point to point.
"Negative movement," Casey ground out. Vuxten noted how the human's voice had suddenly changed. "Not much power in here with the exception of our big friend in the center," he turned and Vuxten could see the cold amber glow in Casey's eyes was fading. "I'm pretty sure we bring everyone through."
Vuxten radioed back and waited as the lock cycled to bring the rest of the platoon through in threes, with Addox coming in last. During the time spent bringing everyone in Casey moved around slowly, walking on the catwalks, careful to never brush any of the wiring. A couple times Vuxten saw him duck or step carefully over nothing and changed his visor.
Laser commo in the high IR range.
Using that data Vuxten started tagging up places for everyone to sit down in such a way that they'd be covered by at least three other members close by. Each time one of the Telkan Marines came through the airlock he guided them over to sit down.
"Sir," Casey's voice broke in. Vuxten looked up and saw that Casey was standing on the middle platform, one hand holding one of the heavy cables that held the platform up.
"Yes, Sergeant?" Vuxten asked, noting that Casey had linked in Addox and Plunex to the conversation.
"I've seen tech like this. It's old Mantid tech for sure, but I'm pretty sure this is what's affectionately referred to as 'after market modifications' by the mechanics," he said. "Computer's Mantid make, systems are Mantid make, machine's Mantid make," he swung slightly and faced Vuxten. "Circumstantial evidence suggests that this thing might possibly have a chance of being built by Mantid."
"You don't say," Addox drawled. "Smartass."
"How's Glory?" Casey suddenly asked.
"Fine. She said for you to quit screwing around and hurry up," Lieutenant Plunex said. "I left a squad with her, she'll be fine."
"Oh," Casey said. He swung a couple of times back and forth and launched himself through the air, landing on the catwalk with a clang.
The pose, the way he seemed to hang there, reminded Vuxten of the Imperium of Rage Marines.
"We have commo outside?" Plunex asked.
"I've got slow commo, text and data only. Having to go full error correction on it," Casey said.
"File a sit-rep, let Command know we're still alive," Plunex said. He looked around. "Where do you think it's going?"
"Somewhere terrible, I'm sure," Vuxten said softly.
The last time I was underground, it didn't work out too well for anyone involved, he thought to himself, staring at the computer arrays on the central platform.
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Artist: The 1975
Album: Notes on a Conditional Form | Alternate Cover Art | 🥾🌍
Label: Dirty Hit | Polydor
Release Date: May 22, 2020
Total Runtime: 1 hour, 20 minutes
Listen Here: Apple Music | Spotify | Youtube Music | Youtube Playlist
Discussion: Popheads Fresh Thread
A Boring Artist Intro
The 1975 are a British synth-pop-rock band consisting of singer Matty Healy, leading guitarist Adam Hann, bassist Ross MacDonald, and drummer George Daniel. Healy is also the primary songwriter and Daniel does a lot of the production work on their tracks. The members met in high school and formed the band while they were still teens playing assorted gigs. Though they first "formed" in 2002, they wouldn't release their first work as The 1975 until 2012.
Prior to 2020 the band had released three albums: The 1975 (2013), I like it when you sleep, for you are so beautiful yet so unaware of it (2016), and A Brief Inquiry Into Online Relationships (2018). While they haven't had a top ten hit single type song yet, they've been fairly well-known and watched in the music sphere since their first album.
Album Intro
When Notes on a Conditional Form was first "announced" (in a sense) it was their third album and titled Music for Cars. Eventually, the band decided to split the Music for Cars album into a two-album era, starting with 2018's A Brief Inquiry Into Online Relationships and ending with some unnamed album to be released in mid-2019. Eventually the album got a release date, a title, and a... memorable piece of cover art (🥾🌍) before being pushed back. Then pushed again. And again. And again. Until suddenly it was 7 singles, a new album art, and nearly a year later before the band actually remembered that there was supposed to be an album tying together all these songs they kept releasing. After enough delay Notes on a Conditional Form finally released on May 22, 2020, more than a year after it was first announced.
The reception for the album was pretty mixed to say the least. The Metacritic average sits at a nice 69 right now, but the individual scores range from a stellar 5/5 from NME to a dismal single star from The Independent UK. Fans were also mixed on the album, with some finding the album a departure from their previous sound and overly bloated, and others enjoying the experimentation and change of pace (with many other criticisms and praises in between).
The album wasn't the only thing to attract mixed reception for the band. The 1975 themselves had a fairly controversial year. I guess that's not really fair. More accurately Matty Healy had a bit of a controversial year. From complaining about independent content creators trying to market themselves during the pandemic to using the George Floyd protests to promote one of the band's songs it was an eventful era on Twitter for Matty, who eventually deactivated his account after the latter incident.
Unfortunately due to the pandemic, they've also had to cancel their planned tour dates for the era. Instead they confirmed they are working on their next album. Luckily they seem to have learned from their mistakes and not announced a release date just yet.
Tracklist
The album has a total of 22 tracks.
22 damn tracks.
Uh, do I have to review all of them? No? Good.
 
...
 
Well that was my first thought process anyways. However, to understand and dissect this album I really have to talk about both what works, and what doesn't. And after including almost all of the album anyways I figured I might as well go all in. If there are a few tracks that get a little less focus I apologize, but I did have to make sure I fit in my 40,000 character limit somehow. Is this write-up going to be long-winded, full of confusing takes, and possibly completely incorrect? Probably. But isn't that really what this album's all about anyway?
So. Here we go. 22 songs. Let's get started.
^{Maybe I should have campaigned harder for a Kesha writeup instead}
Track 1: The 1975
Pre-release track (July 24, 2019) | Popheads Discussion

It's time to rebel

Another album, another track titled after the band. While not an official single, this was the first official piece to be released for the album. The track notably features a spoken word piece by climate activist, teenager, and apparent mortal enemy to 50-year old American conservatives, Greta Thunberg.
I don't really have much to say outside of giving praise to Greta for this piece. It lies out the cold, hard truth, while keeping things (very tentatively) optimistic. It's a call to action to a very important problem. Is it a little... self-indulgent to include this to the start of your album that otherwise has very little to do with climate action? Yes. It's very 1975 of them and as you may see a few more times later on, it's the perfect fit to start off this album.
 
Track 2: People
1st Single (August 22, 2019) | Popheads Discussion

Wake up, wake up, wake up

Nearly a month after the premier opening track, People became the first "official" single released. If you thought you knew what The 1975 was about, this track changed the tone of things completely. It was aggressive and loud and nowhere close to the usual synthpop sound the band was associated with. Unfortunately for those who enjoyed this new direction, this is pretty much the only occurrence of it on the entire album. I have to say that I appreciated it a lot more as a single than I do on the album. It's just kind of placed with really no reason. If it wasn't the only track to go this hard, or if it was placed further in to break up the album a bit maybe it could have worked. At the very least it fits nicely with the opening track, venting Matty's frustrations of the state of the world. While the sound isn't very 1975, the idea definitely is.
 
Track 3: The End (Music For Cars)

Strings intensify

The grandiose strings are a good sound for a song titled "The End", but maybe don't call it that if you're using it as the 3rd track out of 22.
 
Track 4: Frail State of Mind
2nd Single (October 24, 2019) | Popheads Discussion

You lot just leave / I'll stay behind / I'm sorry 'bout my frail state of mind

After "The 1975" and "People", "Frail State of Mind" fit in a lot closer with previous perceptions of the band, though a little more electronic influenced than much of their previous work. The lyrics are based around feelings of depression, social anxiety, and fear of disappointment. The production is a little chaotic, but given the subject material it really works well.
There's a lot to talk about for this song but, the final set of lyrics are some of the most heartbreaking on the album. Matty is isolating himself due to fears of bringing down the mood ("Don't wanna bore you with my frail state of mind"). His friends snap back at him and tell him he's faking it ("Oh, winner, winner, that's your biggest lie. I'm sure that you're fine"). Matty responds back that his struggles are real ("I haven't told a lie in quite some time"). Only for his friends to respond that they'll leave him if he doesn't bottle his real feelings ("You know we'll leave if you keep lying. Don't lie behind your frail state of mind").
I always perceived this as an imagined conversation in the mind of someone with social anxiety. He wants to open up, but is afraid that it will end up pushing his loved ones away. As someone who tends to overthink conversations way too much, these fears and unneeded worries are very much present in many interactions. There are times you want to open up, but the fear of things going wrong prevents any changes, positive or negative, from occurring. On the other interpretation, it being an actual conversation is probably even more heartbreaking as his friends don't trust him at all and instead tell him off for ditching them under the guise of mental health. Unfortunately it's not unusual for mental health to be completely ignored in favour of keeping up a façade of strength so it really can feel like there is no winning at times.
 
Track 5: Streaming

Stream The 1975

I'm pretty sure this is only on the album to get people to search The 1975 on streaming services.
 
Track 6: The Birthday Party
4th Single (February 19, 2020) | Popheads Discussion

I thought that I was stuck in Hell / In a boring conversation with a girl called Mel / 'Bout her friend in Cincinnati called Matty as well

The lyrics for this song take a 'slice of life' style approach. It's a song structured as if it's all taking place during someone's party (per the title). It's fairly light-hearted on the surface, so I always imagined it as a backyard barbeque on a warm summer day. Though it seems to just be about the party at a glance, the lyrical content of the track actually heavily ties into Matty's past experiences with addiction and his recovery. ("There's a place I've been going / Now that I'm clean"). The song's outro lyrics build on it, with his reliance on his friends to typically keep him in line ("I depend / On my friends / To stay clean / As sad as it seems").
Lyrically, it can seem pretty boring to some. He's at a party, talks with some people, not much happens. But I think the song embraces the normalcy of life vs. the appeal of relapse. The party isn't lacking any "interesting" developments, but Matty turns down the advances (mostly) and sticks to the party. He's not really enjoying his time, but he's knows it's better than the aftermath of any alternatives. He still has a long way to go (as he does still try to go for a kiss at one point), so he still relies on his friends to keep him in check. It's not complete control, but it's a start.
 
Track 7: Yeah I Know

Time feels like it's changed, I don't feel the same

With the latest stop on the genre tour bus of NOACF, we're back on the electronic side. It's a nice track, but in my opinion a little forgettable in the broad scope of the album. If you're going to have 22 tracks you should make every one count. The beat's nice, but it feels a little out of place. I do like the lyric "Time feels like it's changed, I don't feel the same", but otherwise not much is going on with only two short verses of content. Unless you want to be told to "Hit that shit" about 20 or 30 times, I don't think many will remember this song for long. It sounds like a draft they came up with, said they'd come back to work on it, and then completely forgot about it after releasing the album.
 
Track 8: Then Because She Goes

We're supposed to leave by half-past eight / Will you stay or wait?

Unfortunately, this is another one of the tracks that I group with "Yeah I Know" in the "Oh yeah I forgot this was on the album"-category. The 1975 again lean back toward a more pop-rock sound compared to their electronic outing in the previous track. Unfortunately, it hits almost the exact same pitfall where nothing interesting really happens .
It seems that in this relationship, one side is a little more (or way-too-much-more) invested in the relationship than the other. Matty's begging with his partner ("You are mine, I’ve been drowning in you", "When you leave, I cry on the inside", etc., etc.). While she seems... a little apprehensive about the whole thing to say the least. By the end of the song he is in the same scenario as the previous chorus and again asks "Will you stay or wait". Thematically, it's kind of fitting how short the song is. Nothing has really changed since the previous time the question was asked. And we never really see how his partner feels about all this. Both the song and the relationship seems all very... rushed. The problem is whether that's by design or if it's another case of a song being left on the drawing board for too long.
 
Track 9: Jesus Christ 2005 God Bless America
5th Single (April 3, 2020) | Popheads Discussion

I'm in love with a boy I know / But that's a feeling I can never show

For one of the first collaborations on any of their songs, the band brings on indie treasure Phoebe Bridgers (stream Punisher) as a guest vocalist. Compared to the rest of the album, the track is stripped down to its barest form. A song doesn't need to become acoustic to have emotional depth, but the sparse nature of the instrumentation brings out the lyrics nicely.
The track is told from the point of view of two closeted individuals at odds with their sexuality and their religion. The lead has fallen into the hole of gay doubt, while continually confirming his love for Jesus Christ (a man) throughout the song . He's assumed that he was straight his whole life such that once he realizes that he is this "demonized gay" his feelings of love aren't happy, but frightening to him ("I'm in love but I'm feeling low"). Phoebe is experiencing similar problems. She also finds herself pining after someone of the same gender ("I'm in love with the girl next door / Her name's Claire"). The similarities keep coming, as she has also become very attracted to her friend and she clearly knows it ("Nice when she comes 'round to call / Then masturbate the second she's not there"). So they hold their feelings inside, hoping that something will change (I'm sure something many of us may have tried, and failed, at some point).
Joining together, the chorus takes a somewhat sarcastic tone to both leads' dilemmas as if their devotion will suddenly fix everything. They both know that they're stuck in a dead end with their beliefs ("Fortunately I believe, lucky me"). They've been told their whole lives that religion can fix their 'problems', but both know in their hearts that they've been looking for acceptance in the wrong spots ("I'm searching for planes in the sea, and that's irony"). And even though I never grew up religious, I definitely relate to the struggles of finding self-acceptance and it's a beautiful song because of that.
 
Track 10: Roadkill

I'll take a minute when I think I won't die from stopping

Roadkill decides to not do electronic OR pop-rock and instead goes a country-esque route. This song is definitely meant to be taken comedically. I mean how could it not with lyrics about literally pissing himself. Still, it's had its fair share of controversy. There was brief complaints about Matty using the f-slur, despite not being LGBTQIA2S+ himself. For the most part, it didn't stir up too much trouble. He was recounting a real life event that happened to him and he didn't want to mince words. Though I get why people are frustrated with it. Perhaps if this was his first problem it wouldn't have been as big a deal, but by the time the album came out he already had a few bouts with the controversy bull.
There was also some minor controversy relating to the line "And I took shit for being quiet during the election / And maybe that's fair, but I'm a busy guy". Or more so, their silence during the UK's 2019 general election. And then telling people off for expecting them to speak up about politics. I don't know why out of all the 1975 faults this one annoyed so much, but it just kind of culminated their other issues together into one pointless line. I think what hurts the band the most is their calls for other artists to speak up about injustices then they just brush things like this off when asked. Like how hard would it have been to give some canned apology? Or at least ignore it? But no, this is The 1975! They need to have an opinion on something, even when that opinion is not having an opinion. And not speaking up because "You're a busy guy". With what? Recording the filler for this album? There are times when radio silence on an issue is fine, but given the current state of politics and the events that happened in elections around the globe why is it something you want to twiddle your thumbs about. I agreed with their reasoning that people shouldn't listen to musicians for political advice, but that doesn't mean people don't. Normally I wouldn't be as critical of something like this for most other artists, but when a band goes around saying they're politically motivated, then do nothing of the sort, it all feels a little disingenuous.
...Oh yeah there's other parts to this song too. The rest of the lyrics are pretty innocuous in relation. Singing about the stresses of touring. I'll admit The country sound actually works quite well with the band. I'd probably like it if the noted parts didn't exist. Yeah the song is a nice little a jam, but all it does when is remind me of all the parts of The 1975 I loathe. I'm sure everyone has at least reminder of how far up their own ass The 1975 can be at times and this one is mine.
 
Track 11: Me & You Together Song
3rd Single (January 16, 2020) | Popheads Discussion

I fell in love with her in stages / My whole life

Me & You Together Song was the band's 3rd single and probably has the most similar sound to the band's previous work. Really you could fit it on one of their early EP's and it wouldn't feel too out of place. It's upbeat enough to jam to, while also having some wistful lyrics to give a bit of depth. It's the classic "one friend falls for the other, but the other doesn't feel the same" trope. It doesn't look like the relationship is going to develop at all, but that doesn't stop the pining. Really this is the song that Then Because She Goes wishes it was. Matty does a much better outlining the shared relationship between him and this girl and their history. Many compared it to the standard rom-com movies that were all too prevalent in the 2000's and I completely get their comparison. It's a great light-hearted break from the emotional weight of the rest of the album. It also helps that the song is super fun to jam out to with some of the best guitar work and vocal delivery on the album.
 
Track 12: I Think There's Something You Should Know

How would you know? It doesn't show

I Think There's Something You Should Know hops back off the acoustic-country-pop-rock train to the electronic side of the album. Lyrically it takes a similar path as "Frail State" did earlier: Matty's trying to open up to someone else that he's not in a great mental state right now. He feels like the fame is getting to him and although he's doing well in the band, it's at the cost of his health. By external measures he is "successful", but it really doesn't feel that way. It's like when he hears that "The 1975 is successful" it's someone else that is experiencing that success, a false image of him in the limelight. He wishes he could be that successful person ("I'd like to meet myself and swap clothes"), but his mental health is holding him back from feeling happy with himself. As he puts it "You get a moment when you feel alright", but it still doesn't change the fact that he feels miserable behind everything.
 
Track 13: Nothing Revealed / Everything Denied

Life feels like a lie / I need something to be true / Is there anybody out there?

This track is my personal favourite of the non-singles. It also has some of the more interesting production choices on the album. Matty Healy decides that if there's anything a synth-pop-rock band like The 1975 could use, it would be some psuedo-rapping. By him. And somehow I still like the song. I don't know if I'd say it worked... but it doesn't ruin the song in any capacity.
Really if there's anything more fitting of an album released during quarantine it's this existential track. The chorus especially is the kind of cathartic experience that makes you want to shout out after being stuck inside for weeks at a time. The song deals with Matty building up false history for himself that doesn't really fit his current lifestyle anymore. He's told so many lies passed off as truth that it's getting hard to hold onto them any more. At the time a single lie seems like a fine idea, but then it builds and builds and suddenly he doesn't like what he has become anymore. He knows it's not him. At this point he just wants to open up to someone, but the things they know about him aren't even real. This is him finally hoping to give some truth and become a person he enjoys being, if that's even possible any more.
 
Track 14: Tonight (I Wish I Was Your Boy)

Tonight, I think I fucked it royally

The production alone on this track already makes it one of my favourites on the album. Despite the upbeat nature, the lyrics hit the sweet spot of painfully sad and trying not to seem too bothered. Following the previous track, Tonight also deals with making mistakes that might be too far along to fix. The lyrics land neatly in a spot we can all relate with, messing something up for yourself so bad that you just have to sit down and think "What the fuck was I thinking" and trying not to break down. In this case, it's issues in his romantic life. At this point, the relationship is pretty much over so all he can do now is reflect on what went wrong. I really love the lyrics "And it's been replaying on my mind / Unfortunately, I've been to this place in my life / Far too many times / Sunday's nearly over, so I'll just lie awake" cause I think we've all had a time when there's nothing left to do but sit in your bed thinking about what went wrong. But it's Sunday, there's no time to reflect as life will continue on as normal once Monday comes around. As one could maybe guess from the title, he's now at the point where he finally realizes what he lost, but it's a little too late. As Matty says quite aptly in the chorus, "Tonight, I think I fucked it royally".
 
Track 15: Shiny Collarbone

???

While there are lyrics to this song, I just count it as another instrumental track. Out of all of the hit/miss tracks on the album I've found this one has been the most controversial. It's definitely interesting, I'll give it that for sure. But it just feels so out of place. Some people will really enjoy this, but it's not for me.
 
Track 16: If You’re Too Shy (Let Me Know)
6th Single (April 23, 2020) | Popheads Discussion

Maybe I would like you better if you took off your clothes

So two things I've learned from looking into this song.
1) It's not actually about just taking off your clothes for a nude video call
2) Okay, it actually still kind of is about taking off your clothes for a nude video call
But maybe I'm getting ahead of myself at the moment. "If You're Too Shy" takes a page out of the book of the previous albums' "It's Not Living" and "The Sound" and goes all out. With the bombastic chorus, an amazing sax solo, and lyrics 10x more catchy than they have any right to be, it's hard not to bop along. It also features the first appearance of FKA Twigs (stream Don't Judge Me) on the album as a backing vocalist.
Really the song is so bright and upbeat that I almost don't care what it's about. He could be describing a perfect recipe for banana bread, or talking about how nice the weather is. Regardless, there is still a lyrical part of this song. And what subject are we onto this time? Why, sexy online messaging of course! Which is actually… pretty fitting for when the track was released considering many were stuck in lockdown.
Matty still has a lot of the same fears as other songs on the album, but here we can see him start to build up his confidence. All so he can show off his privates to some random internet lady. Just kidding. (Kind of). Though the lyrics are played a bit tongue in cheek, it's not literally talking about calls in the nude (well, I guess it still could be but it's not the principal focus anyways). Really the removal of clothes is the singer opening up and letting this woman see him at his most revealed and vulnerable, both mentally ^{and maybe physically.}
 
Track 17: Playing On My Mind

I think I've seen the side of every road / They all lead somewhere, I've been told

Sad acoustic 1975 time? Then let's bring Phoebe Bridgers back again on backing vocals! Continuing the anxious theme of the past, the lyrics follow up by looking toward the future and figuring out how Matty's going to fuck that up instead. Or at least how he think he will. And how he thinks he already has. From the starting "Will I live and die in a band?". We've got a window into a bunch of his biggest worries in life.
It's easy to get caught up in your own mind sometimes. As shown from previous tracks on the album, it's not like he lacks regrets. Is there anything that he can do to stop creating more? If he thinks about his life in advance will it prevent him from making the same mistakes? Not likely. Turns out messing up is just a part of life. "See, I keep getting this stuff wrong, take me out, put me on". Still, it's hard not to worry when it keeps happening again and again.
 
Track 18: Having No Head

How's your head?

The final instrumental of the album and, honestly, the only one I actually remember exists. The 6 minute runtime allows the track to actually build up and do something interesting. The instruments on the track take on elements from house and trance music. It may not be everyone's cup of tea, but at least it feels like they thought about how it should fit onto the album unlike the other two (and a half) instrumentals.
 
Track 19: What Should I Say

What should I say? / Tell 'em the things that you told me / What should I say?

Before diving too far into the lyrical side, can I talk about how fantastic the production is here!? This is second track on the album to feature backing vocals from Twigs and another that follows the electronic influence. Twigs provides some absolutely haunting vocal effects throughout the song. It's all very controlled for the most part, yet something there's an air of anxiety to the vocals, plus the production keeps up the speed and doesn't slow down. The lyrics aren't too detailed, but the minimal use of words is all that's needed.
So let's go back to "Roadkill" and all the other controversies caused by Matty putting his foot in his mouth. This song (along with Frail State and Tonight) really help me understand The 1975 "please Matty stop talking" experience from his side. Really it's about how anxious Matty feels being in the public eye. This track in particular shows his particular issue of not knowing what to do or say under pressure, but still feeling the pressure to say something. Anything. Despite practicing what to do and what to say in advance, he still feels the heat and often messes up because of it. He's looking for any kind of excuse for his behaviour, but at the end of the day he feels that it's all on himself. Sometimes he doesn't understand what he said to cause pushback ("Must have been something you were saying"), but it doesn't always stop him from panicking about it. Sometimes he does finally realize the full impact of his words ("What did I say"), but it's already too late.
 
Track 20: Bagsy Not In Net

And leaving you here is the thing that I fear, so I fight it

Another track following on the electronic train. The production on this one is nice, but after 19 songs before this I couldn't blame people if they forgot it. At this point the band probably would have had enough music for a full electronic-inspired album instead of this weird hybrid. According to Matty, the song is about a couple taking the words "til death do us part" literally. The lead is trying to hold on to life to avoid leaving his partner behind. Asking "Do you want to leave at the same time?" in the chorus refers to the act of passing on together. It's a sweet song that probably could have been built on a little more (especially since it was one of the last to be added to the album), but it works for the most part.
 
Track 21: Don't Worry

Don't worry, darling, the sun will shine through

On "Don't Worry", we've got the albums third feature, Tim Healy (Matty's father). In fact, he's the one who wrote most of the lyrics! I don't have much to say about the track itself. It's a sweet ballad (a common theme with these last 3 tracks) told to a loved one. In specific this case father to son, but it's general enough to apply to any relationship. It's a song of reassurance. Given the fears and anxieties that have been expressed earlier in the album, it's always good to know that someone is in your corner, whether it's family (this song) or friends (the next).
 
Track 22: Guys
7th Single (May 13, 2020) | Popheads Discussion

You guys are the best thing that ever happened to me

The seventh and final single released also happens to be the final track of the album. Guys is a sickeningly sweet song giving thanks to Matty's bandmates for sticking with him after all this time. Lyrically it’s very specific to Matty’s own experiences - living with his friends, being in a band with his friends, traveling to Japan with his friends, etc. And at the end of the day this is the sincere closer the album needed.
I'm going to be honest, I'm kind of a sucker about nostalgic tracks like this. Say what you want about the posturing and pretentiousness of the other songs, but anyone can tell that this is an earnest effort to give genuine thanks to his friends. Really it (and also The Birthday Party) does a good job showing that the band isn't primarily making music for the fame or the fans or the money. They just enjoy what they do; it's all something they started together and its what drives them to continue. The true Notes were the friends he made along the way, in a way.
Another thing this track made me realize is that I truly believe everything Matty Healy says out loud he fully believes in. Are some of his takes incredibly useless, shortsighted, and ignorant? Oh for sure. But I don't believe he's doing it to get any sort of clout. Him and the rest of the band are a bunch of friends from some town out of England that have managed a monumental growth to stardom. They aren't always prepared so they do what they think is best. Is that an excuse for some of the shit he pulls sometimes? Definitely not. At the end of the day they're all grown adults that can be accountable for their own actions. But the track, and the album as the whole, help show why Matty feels he needs to speak all the time, his anxieties with fame and life, and how he can still keep going forward with the band's music.
Overall Thoughts On the Album
It's a mess for sure. And I love it. It's a mess and I love it. I love it because it's a mess. I'm not sure I would love it as much if it wasn't a mess. Odd eh? Despite all my gripes about the band and the album, I still love it. I think this would probably be the last 1975 album I would recommend newcomers listen to, but it does a great job (whether intentional or not) capturing their essence.
I still think "If You're Too Shy" is my favourite track on its own, but "Guys" ties everything together so perfectly. It's responsible for it being an album I can say I enjoy as a whole, instead of a collection of tracks I kind of like. Are there songs that I skip nearly every time I listen to the album? 100%. But at least I can tell what the band was trying to accomplish. Also want to mention the non-single combo of I Think There's Something You Should Know - Nothing Revealed / Everything Denied - Tonight (I Wish I Was Your Boy) - Playing On My Mind - What Should I Say is a captivating and underrated representation of fear and anxiety. It's not a far departure from the themes of their earlier work, but it works for a reason.
It's a great imperfect album. There are some parts that get on my nerves, but at the end of the day it works with the theme of the album. If I had to make a (kind of weird) comparison, it's very similar to my love for Closer (yes that Closer - and I know rate people are probably sick of the song by now). Closer is about dumb kids making dumb decisions. And they fully believe in their decisions. Does it make the choices any less dumb? Heck no! The listener knows their reasoning for being together is so obviously flawed. But for that it is both captivating, and (at times) relatable. Looking from the outside it's obviously wrong, but for the ones experiencing it they have very little idea how to make things right. It's not a defense to those actions, but can definitely make it more relatable and understandable.
One point I haven't mentioned much that comes up often on the album is the idea of cancel culture. This part... I'm a little mixed on. I don't want to use a review about an overly long 1975 album to start a huge discourse about it, but it comes up a few times and can't be ignored when talking about celebrities making dumb decisions. I think there are definitely cases where the internet can be overzealous shutting down someone's career over past things said (especially if a genuine self-reflection or apology is issued). In more serious cases there are also some that will defend their favourites with the same reasoning, even though there are serious conversations that should probably be had. In severe cases there are also times that cancel culture has shown to have no effect when it really should (look at... well basically any of the successes that Chris Brown or Dr. Luke are still experiencing).
But going back to the album: whether each point is right or wrong isn't what the album's about. It's about the process of fucking up sometimes. And how it happens to everyone. The stuff that can ruin relationships or create a missed opportunity or anything makes you wonder if you could have done better. It happens and it hurts. And sometimes it's over something dumb (see: every 1975 controversy). Sometimes you know you fucked up. And sometimes you feel you are still in the right (and sometimes you are!). Either way, it happens. You can try to plan and overthink and worry, but it will happen. And this album is a fantastic representation of that mix of regret, worry, self-reflection, and self-frustration that follows.
Am I reaching for points with very little basis? Probably. But I've listened to this 22-song album so many times I want to at least get something out of it.

For those skipping to the end

TL;DR: This is a great album that messes up its execution at times. It's also about people messing up. It's not perfect and it's much more interesting because of that. It's also a bit bloated and they really q could have cut it down a little.
Recommendations: All of the singles, Nothing Revealed/Everything Denied, Playing On My Mind, Tonight (I Wish I Was Your Boy), What Should I Say
Discussion Points

1. Let's get the big one out of the way first: What are your thoughts on the album? Did you enjoy it? Hate it? Somewhere in between?
2. What direction or sound should the band go with for the next album?
3. For those who listen to versions of albums you’ve personally altered (either by shortening, adding to, or rearranging the tracklist), do you take your edited or the original into account when considering your enjoyment of the album (or a bit of both)?
4. Genre-hopping: can it work on an album where fans are expecting one, but get something different? Do you think albums should mostly stick to one consistent sound?
5. There is often talk (not just in the music sphere) about authenticity of celebrities when championing social causes. Sometimes it's all for clout, sometimes it's important to speak up, sometimes the artist speaks up and then you realize you wish they didn't. Do you feel celebrities have an obligation to speak up for social causes? Or should they keep out of those discussions?
6. On a lighter note: Come up with a worse two-emoji cover for this album than 🥾🌍

Hi everyone, in my hunt for the right sized ring, I have bought the same piece of 18k jewelry 3 times. I know I should have gone to the store to get sized, but with Covid I was too hesitant to do so. I just plan to sell the ones that don't fit, so not a total loss. On to the review - I'll break down all 3 in depth and do the final comparisons at the end.
CCW!
Disclosures
I have not gotten any incentives from any of the sellers. I know a couple will offer free shipping or a discount on your shipping for next order for a review, but I haven't contacted anyone for this, nor have I been offered one.
I originally wanted the pink gold, but decided against it in my other orders as the colour seemed to blend in with my skintone and didn't really pop. It was a really beautiful rose gold though.
Materials All sellers use 18k gold. I'm not sure about Li, but XY uses lab diamonds while Miss Chen uses natural/mined diamonds. I have not made edits to the quality sections as I do not personally think it makes a huge difference to me, but please take this into consideration if you do prefer certain materials over others.
Sizing Information
I originally wanted the ring for my ring finger, which I measured with a measuring tape to be 47. The ring fit, but very tightly and left an ugly muffin-top. A 48 would have been much more comfortable. I have gotten a ring on Etsy before where I measured my finger at 14.80mm, and the girl had a ring sizer stick which said I was US size 4 so I went with that. Not sure why I went for the smaller size now, looking back at Cartier's size chart.
When I reordered, I decided I wanted to wear it on my middle finger. I measured myself and gave a little more slack this time, with the stupid measuring tape again. Obviously the size 54 was too big for any of my fingers, even my thumb. No idea what I was thinking here. I then bought a ring sizer off Amazon due to the advice of some repladies, and measured my middle finger to be a size 5. It fit snug so I figured a 51 would fit better than a 50. The 51 fits well with no muffin top, but does snag on my knuckle when I try to take it off, so I know it is secure. The link to the amazon ring sizer I used here. For anyone this may help.
Review
Seller: TS Li: Pink gold 1 diamond, size 47 Factory Li was the only one I asked for factory pics of, but it doesn't really help for jewelry since the details are so miniscule you can't tell from a photo. I like relying on the reviews of others instead.
PSP
My Photos
Auth
Price and Payment: 2300CNY + 280CNY for shipping - paid with transferwise
Timeline:
Oct 5 - Contacted
Oct 6 - Paid in full with transferwise
Oct 10 - PSPs sent
Oct 12 - Shipped out
Nov 3 - Received
I believe shipping was with EMS but I can't 100% remember
Quality: 9/10
I want to preface this by saying I am not a trained eye at Cartier jewelry. The colour seemed to be very spot on to videos and photos I have seen of the ring. It was weighty, and packaged very nicely. The engraving was crisp, and so were the screw motifs. I took -1 point for the thickness of it. When I compared this to Miss Chen's rep, her ring was definitely thicker. I did take into consideration that this was vastly smaller, but I am not sure if that should change the thickness overall. The diamond was a good size and very shiny.
Li's ring came with a certificate of precious materials, which is great.
Accuracy: 8.75/10
Same with the above points, I took -0.5 off for the thickness. I tried to find the numbers online; the thickness should be 1.5mm. I did not get a chance to measure this one but from memory I believe it was thinner. I took off another -0.25 as the screw motifs seems to be a little more crisp - if you look at photos, the middle line does seem to be a bit thicker and a tiny bit deeper than the auth. It's a small deduction as I am being VERY picky. The size of the diamond seems spot on. Now, the ring of gold around the diamond - this is thicker than the auth for sure. This could result in a smaller diamond being added to the ring. I took -0.5 off for this as to me it is a bigger deal, but it is also impossible to tell while you are wearing it. Anyone would have to be at eye level an inch away from the ring, while holding the auth beside it to tell.
The engraving font seems similar to the examples I've seen. I cannot 100% judge the contents of the inner engraving as it seems to be different in many rings, in terms of style. See the auth and my photos for what I mean.
I did not take points off for colour as that seems quite accurate, as well as size. I measured the width and the website says it should be 36mm. My tape seems to show the same numbers, if not a bit off.
Packaging I received was a regular unbranded jewelry box.
Service/Communication: 10/10
TS Li was friendly and spoke fully in Chinese. I don't mind at all, I can't read any of it so I just used my translator and it worked fine. I communicated in English fully and they must have just translated my words as well. The ring was made quickly, I didn't have to check up on them, and it was a smooth transaction. It only took a week to make the ring. They take payments as a deposit or full - I just did the full payment so I didn't have to mess with transferwise anymore. I actually tried to reorder from Li again for my third round but I couldn't get the transferwise to work so I ultimately went with XY. No fault of Li, they had an amazing price for the ring, great service, just bummed that they only take transferwise.
Satisfaction: 5/10
Obviously didn't fit, so I was pretty bummed. And also surprised at just how underwhelmed I was at the colour on my skintone. This does not reflect quality or accuracy at all - I would have been quite happy with this ring if it did fit, despite the few inaccuracies of it.
Seller: TS Miss Chen: Yellow gold, size 54
No factory photos given - I just sent a photo and asked for the specific ring. She sent me a chart with all prices and ring examples.
PSP
My Photos
Auth
Price and Payment: 530USD + 30USD for packaging. I think the 30USD includes shipping in the packaging but I'm not too sure as we didn't really break it down and I didn't end up clarifying with her.
Timeline:
Nov 6 - Contacted, MC got back in 24 hours
Nov 8 - asked to order, MC responded in a day
Nov 9 - clarified shipping and sent full payment with transferwise.
Checked in about a week just to ask for shipping time. She said another week (so 14 day wait time)
Nov 22 - received PSPs
Nov 23 - shipped packaging and ring together
Dec 3 - Received package - I got dinged about $35CAD for duties booo but what are you going to do. Shipping was DHL.
Quality: 10/10
When I first opened this up I was surprised at how heavy it was. It was definitely well made, weighty, shiny, and diamond looked great. It didn't fit, but that's alright. This is also thicker than I expected, however I've never held the auth in my hands so I wouldn't know exactly. Diamond looks perfect. I've heard lots of stories of Miss Chen's quality and I honestly cannot complain.
Accuracy: 10/10 (edited from 9/10)
So the screwhead engraving seemed to be more accurate. It wasn't as 'sharp' as Li's, but matched more closely to the auth. It's hard to explain what I mean but hopefully the photos show it. The middle line seems to be more accurate as it was thinner and a tiny bit more shallow. Diamond size correlates with the photos and videos I've seen online. I don't know what the weight would be, but there's so much fluctuation with size I didn't bother weighing it with my scale. The thickness is about 1.6 or 1.5mm. It is really hard to measure this accurately but I would say this is closest to 1.5mm, if not a bit more.
Inside engraving I took off -1 point for - this is the part where I apologize about - I have no idea what the inside is supposed to look like, but I am pretty sure it should come with a serial number.
Never mind! There is an inside engraving, I was just not sure what it was - turns out it is the UG 1686! Full points here for Miss Chen! Thank you to RL Shop2udrop for helping me discover this!
Packaging - font is a bit bigger on the bag compared to the auth, and honestly the packaging is not that accurate. But it works for the untrained eye or a display on your shelf away from prying hands.
Service/Communication: 9/10
Miss Chen took a while to get back with responses, but it's never been more than a day. However I was a bit impatient with waiting for a response, especially when I knew what I wanted and I wanted to pay in full as soon as I could. But communication was smooth, Miss Chen was friendly, and transaction went through with no issues. She was responsive and updated me first with any shipping delays without me having to check in. Keep in mind this is an extremely busy time and she must have been swamped with orders so I understand the longer wait time, but would have liked to purchased quicker!
Satisfaction: 8/10
Again because it didn't fit, but the colour was exactly what I wanted! Also the weight of it was really nice. I really wished this would have fit at least one of my finger but oh well. I feel that this one was the most accurate - more on this below.
Non-TS XY: Yellow gold, size 51 Contact info: XiangYaoJewelry on Wechat.
No factory photos given - I just sent a photo and asked for the specific ring. They have an instagram with all their jewelry examples (handle same as wechat ID)
PSP
Photos
Auth
Price and Payment: 3100CNY + 200CNY for shipping
Timeline Dec 8 - Contacted and paid a 50% deposit because well, it was a new seller and not a TS. They took paypal, which is one of the few reasons I chose to go with XY as my transferwise was giving me so much issues.
Dec 17 - checked up on order, they told me total time takes about 15-20 days after placing the order - totally fine
Dec 25 - Merry Christmas 'cause ya girl got her PSPs - GLed immediately and paid rest of 50% deposit
Dec 31 - Happy new years eve 'cause ya girl got her goods
Shipping was DHL
Quality: 9/10
I also expected this to be on the heavier side. Upon scrutinizing it looks to be a bit thinner than Miss Chen's - more on that later. Colour, diamond, and screw motifs look very nice though. Engravings were deep and crisp, and it is obviously a very well made ring. I know XY is newer on the Repladies scene, but I am super impressed. Quality wise, I can tell this is a really well made ring. I would put this on par with TS Li's if not a bit better.
Accuracy: 9/10
Same 'issues' with TS Li's - now that I have compared the photos closely, the gold ring around the diamond may be either thicker, or more flattened (which gives off the look at it is thicker). So I deducted 0.5. It is almost impossible to tell if the diamonds are different sizes, even right beside each other. I don't think it is and the difference seems to be too small to mention, so I won't take a full point off for it. Now, the thicc-ness. This measures to be about 1.3 or 1.4mm. It's not visible to the naked eye unless you're really super up close. Even less so on a moving hand. Like I said above, it should be around 1.5mm if the internet is correct. I'll deduct another 0.5 for that.
Screw motifs look good. Inside engraving is there and looks good, plus the addition of a serial number, which I am very happy with.
Seller Communication/Service: 10/10
Quick responses, takes paypal, and transaction was suuuuper smooth. Very professional - when I first added them, they had an auto message linking me to their instagram (same as their wechat ID). They did ship without notifying me of the tracking number, but DHL sent me a text right when they did so I didn't even bother checking up with them. Overall, they were detailed and I have no complaints at all. The ring was packaged very very well, with layers of bubble wrap and it was shrink wrapped on the inside as well. The plain jewelry box is a nice quality as well!
Satisfaction: 9/10
For the price, it was almost comparable to what Miss Chen charges, but it lacked the accuracy and thickness of her ring. I am happy that it finally fits and that it looks amazinggg but I would have paid the extra few hundred CNY to get the top quality that she charges. I ultimately wanted to try a new seller as I was impatient and didn't want to wait for Miss Chen to get back to me. However, I don't regret going with XY either.
Comparison Photos
Here's what we're here for. Unfortunately since I do not have Li's ring anymore, I will only have comparison photos between XY and MC. Miss Chen's is the bigger and thicker ring (as it is a larger size). It's impossible to mix up:
Comparison Pics
Questions I've Gotten:
Which Seller was your favourite, quality/price/communication wise?
Quality: Miss Chen - for reasons above, I do think her prices are higher and they may not be proportional to what you're getting, but I can't fault the craftsmanship that I get. It is quite a high jump, but it all depends on how accurate of an item you will be happy with. Also I would ask about the serial number next time.
Price: Price for craftsmanship, definitely Li. Great quality ring, AMAZING price.
Communication: Hard to find favourites here. I thought everyone was quite steller. Mind you, I didn't really come with questions; I'm a girl who shops for what she wants after doing a bunch of reading on my own. Possibly Miss Chen as she seemed to be the most polite and friendly, with 'please' and 'dear', and the handshake emoji. Love that emoji, always reminds me of closing a business deal.
Favourite overall?
Miss Chen. I know some have commented that she likes to brag about how her stuff is better without having the quality to back it up, but I would have to disagree, at least for Cartier pieces. It is quite expensive, but as someone who bought the same ring 3 times, I will tell you that I noticed a difference the second I held her work. Will I buy from her again? Possibly only for Cartier items, I can't comment on other brands. I would not hesitate to buy from XY or Li for VCA, but I will probably only stick with MC for Cartier.
Edits:
Material used section
Miss Chen accuracy rating
Thanks for making it this far! Happy holidays everyone!

Intro:
Today I'm going to focus on signs of whether to move on, leave, and overall indicate if your reddit friendship is heading in a positive direction. Along with some mistakes commonly made and some methods to start the conversation.
Messaging Someone:
You found someone you want to message, great! So there are three ways that are appropriate approaches ^{(if you have any other that work extremely well put it in the comments of this post})
Before we get to that I want to say when deciding to message someone or not HAVE CONFIDENCE!!!! I hate it when I look at a post and I see people commenting saying "blah blah blah hmu" HAVE SOME DAMN CONFIDENCE AND INITIATE THE CONVERSATION!! I get that when you do this your trying to be polite and not trying to be a creep but it just does not work.
Mindset: When you message these people I want you to treat it like an elevator pitch. There are some redditors getting hundreds of messages and comments when they make a post. KEEP THAT IN MIND! Here are some ways you can message someone:

1. Asking a Question: Not a small talk question like "how are u" make it specific to the post. At the same time keep in mind some people may be asking the same questions so try to be unique with them

Ex: A lot of people put something like "I like video games" in their reddit post.
This person has already been asked "which video games do you play" like 50 times!! A better idea would be asking which video game genre do they like or even asking which of their hobbies listed are they most passionate about and then go from there.
^{People who are in the situation where they have been asked the same question so many damn times it would be a big help if you would tell us a good alternate solution in your opinion}
2) Introducing Yourself: Stating what you like, what your looking for in a friendship, and the fact that you want to be friends with them is a rather personal and up-front way to get the conversation started.
But what do I say after I introduce myself???? Funny enough it is based on their reaction but if they give a one word answer like "k" or "cool lol" then you could start launching off some questions until you find a conversation point. Although with a response like that it could either mean they are disinterested or they are talking to so many people they don't have the time to give a good response.
3) A compliment: NO NO NO this does not mean find a female say she looks hot and wait for results. COMPLIMENT SOMEONE BASED ON SOMETHING THAT THEY CAN CONTROL.
Ex: DO NOT say "girl you thicccer than a bowl of oatmeal"
Rather say "You look great in that photo I like your outfit style" ^{(the more specific you get the better in my opinion}\*******)*
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AM I WATERING A DEAD PLANT?
Odd phrase but it will make sense soon enough
So your messaging someone and just ended your first conversation or maybe you've been talking for a while but how do you know if its going well?
NOTE: WITH EVERYTHING I SAY HERE NOTE IT IS A RED/GREEN FLAG IF IT HAPPENS CONSISTENTLY OVER THE COURSE OF A FEW WEEKS OR EVEN MONTHS
Green Flags:
50/50: You are BOTH initiating conversation. I'm not talking about "well we have had about 10 convos and I initiated 9 of them but they messaged like 1 time" NO I'm talking about a 1 to 1 ratio or something very close to it.
****If you're always the one scheduling, having to reach out or initiate conversation then its not worth it. Your watering a dead plant. And odds are you deserve so much more than to just talk to someone who doesn't even care whether you message them or not. FIND SOMEONE WHO IS WILLING TO MEET YOU HALF WAY
MOIST TEXTING: Get your mind out of gutter lmao let me explain what I mean. Moist Texting is when you're out of that loop of small talk and stuff getting awkward. YOU CAN HAVE A CONVO ABOUT ANYTHING WHETHER IT BE SPORTS, CAREER ENDEAVORS, OR SOMETHING AS IDIOTIC AS IF MR. CLEAN IS ATTRACTIVE OR NOT
****usually replies are hella consistent during moist texting. Your getting replies like every 4-8 mins not every other day or every 5 hours
(THIS IS NOT ME SAYING IF THIS PERSON DOESN'T TEXT YOU BACK IN 5 MINS EVERY TIME THEN DROP THEM)
RED FLAGS:
THEY NEVER MESSAGE YOU FIRST: This is in my opinion the biggest red flag!!!!! Even if they respond to you consistently and you two do stuff all the time a lack of initiation on their part means one simple harsh reality: THEY ONLY RESPOND BECAUSE THEY DON'T HAVE ANYTHING BETTER TO DO. ONCE THEY FIND SOMEONE WHO THEY ARE WILLING TO MEET HALFWAY AND MESSAGE CONSISTENTLY THEN THEY WON'T BE REPLYING TO YOU ANYMORE
(That sounds really dark but please remember the person could also be very busy with their life. Also please remember that if this happens over the course of like a few weeks to a few months then that's where green and red flags should be applied)
I TOOK 5 MINS TO RESPOND BUT IT TAKES YOU 3 DAYS !!!!?????: The title for this section is over dramatic but if you are consistently replying after 3-6 mins and it takes them hours on hours each time that's not the best look (ONCE AGAIN REMEMBER THEY COULD JUST BE A BUSY PERSON).
Now I will admit the reddit chat system is so damn bad so if its strictly on reddit take this red flag with a grain of salt but if its on discord or snapchat or any platform where you can either see they read your message or they are online and it takes them hours/days to respond.....that's rough buddy
Also note that a lot of people will say "don't be dry texter when you message me" but remember it goes both ways. You both have to be moist texters.
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MISTAKES THAT YOU ARE MAKING
Alright so lets say every person you message has these red flags. Then the problem might be you. So here are some mistakes that I feel that I've seen others and myself make
SMALL TALK: Now if you have known this person for like 6 months or something then yeah small talk is generally acceptable BUT if you have just started talking YOU NEED TO YEET THAT SMALL TALK BS INTO THE STRATOSPHERE!!!!!!
Nothing kills a convo faster then getting trapped at the grips of what to do next after small talk. Unless you really know this person don't engage in the typical "How r u?" "I'm good hbu?" type of conversations. Yes it is easy and gets you a response because it is easy to reply to but after about four text messages an awkward gap of silence is just waiting to take place.
STOP BEING A PEST: So what if you've had like 5 convos over the course of a week and they haven't initiated anything, what do you do?
Pull back and take like a week or two and just don't conversate because you might be overwhelming someone and they don't want to tell you. Wait a week or two and message again. If they don't respond then that's rough buddy.
BUT WHAT IF THE SAME PATTERN CONTINUES
You keep having convos and you're the only one initiating!!! Well you know that's a red flag and you have two options:
1) STOP TEXTING THEM ALL TOGETHER: You were watering a dead plant. Stop watering it, the damn plant is dead. BUT IF YOU DID THIS YOU CHOSE THE WRONG OPTION (IMO)
2) CALL THEM OUT: IF THERE IS SOMETHING PEOPLE NEVER DO HERE IT IS HONESTY!!! *****NEVER BE AFRAID TO TEXT SOMEONE AND TELL THEM YOU FEEL LIKE THEY AREN'T PUTTING THE SAME ENERGY IN THIS FRIENDSHIP AS YOU ARE
They either won't reply, get mad, or hell maybe even have an actual conversation about feelings. You may not like the results of what happens after you send this but it is going to do so much more for you mentally than just getting sad and either ghosting someone or being ghosted. Go get yourself some closure!!! (Also don't call them out if its only been like 3 days or something ridiculous like that)
YOUR LIKE EVERYONE ELSE: I'm going to make this one short as I said it already put please stray away from asking predictable questions. When people go right be that one person that goes left!!
Ex:
Person 1: "I like to play basketball"
You: "What position do you play" <---- WRONG EVERYONE IS ASKING SOMETHING LIKE THIS
Instead maybe answer with a witty reply
(Bad example but I'm making this up on the fly) You: "I bet you're good enough to beat tom brady in a 1v1"
I KNOW BRADY PLAYS FOOTBALL BUT WHICH MESSAGE DO YOU THINK IS THIS PERSON GOING TO REPLY TO? STATING THEIR POSITION FOR THE 99th time or A MESSAGE THAT CAUGHT THEM OFF GUARD AND STANDS OUT
EXPRESS EMOTIONS: USE THOSE DAMN EXCLAMATION POINTS, QUESTION MARKS AND EMOJIS. They seriously add a whole new depth to the conversation
**********YOUR NOT SCHEDULING: Scheduling something to do with someone is dorky but it is EFFECTIVE! By scheduling I mean get a day and a time that works for both of you guys. This can eliminate something like always asking someone to get online and play and them turning you down because they are busy.
PLEASE USE SCHEDULING ESPECIALLY IF THIS PERSON LIVES IN A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE
But what if we always schedule and they never show up because they forgot?
That's rough buddy and that is a red flag. (If this happens once or twice then don't freak put up if it happens like 6 out of every 7 times then yeah that's a bad thing also if you're the one always scheduling to do something and they never do that is a red flag)
LONG MESSAGES: Often times you are being too wordy. Try condensing your text message to be readable but also short.
\**Rule of thumb: Long meaningful replies to questions but short interesting replies to statements*
FILTERING YOURSELF: When you reply sometimes you think too much and go with a "safe reply" but don't do that because everyone else is going with that "safe reply'!
(This filter thing is not an excuse to go insult or make a pervy comment towards someone)
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Mentality
I'm going to reiterate some things mentioned earlier but they are that important
Realize some people are getting hundreds of messages and odds are they are only looking for one or two people at max. They may find those people before they even get to your message
Do not build up unreasonable expectations:
If you see that this person likes all the things you like don't go off and make a fantasy in your head where you picture them a certain way and build up an expectation.
Go in with no expectations and take the person for what they are!!!
Accept that 80% of the people you talk to won't develop into the friendship you want or a friendship at all
Be open, honest, and kind to whoever you talk to. Also ask deep question that encourage open ended conversations.
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That's pretty much it PLEASE LEAVE YOUR OWN TIPS AND TRICKS FOR HAVING GOOD CONVOS IN THE COMMENTS.
ALSO PLEASE COMMENT ON HOW TO MAKE A GOOD POST THAT CAN GET PEOPLE TO REPLY. (I'm actually curious to see what you guys come up with)
If you read to this point.....you are a scholar 😎

I've put a fair few hours into this game after playing the board game with my family. I played some ranked and climbed to intermediate rank (4th from the top) and beat some grandmasters and masters (1st and 2nd best rank) and have decided to stop playing because the game falls short in many areas and can make for very frustrating or boring games.
You get to try the game for free, you get maybe 15 games for free, then you pay £12.49 as a one-off payment and can play as much as you like. So it's not free, but I think £12.49 is fair.
Before delving into all the things that could be improved, I'll talk about what's GOOD about the game. 1. Time If you've played the board game, you'll know how long the games can be, this game does a fantastic job of making games last about 30 mins to an hour rather than the hours and hours the board game takes. 2. Blitz. Blitz calculates the probabilities of the dice rolls and simulates them as if you're fighting to the death and instantly gives you the result as opposed to rolling each time. As a result, it saves so much time. You still have the choice to attack with 1-3 dice too. Blitz assumes you want to attack with 3. 3. Alliances and secret teaming. Alliances are probably my favourite part. You can make a secret alliance with any other real player. They can choose to accept and if they do you can ask them to attack other players, give them permission to attack you, or tell them you need to attack them. You can also send them thumbs up, down, and a love heart. This is good for avoiding defending all fronts. 4. Emotes. You can emote and also BM other players. There are 6 emoji's to use as well as phrases like "Good luck!" and "Good game!" as well as "Hurry up" (lol). This is great as it allows you to express how you think the game is going or how you reacted to your opponents' moves. The only issue is you can emote for as long and as often as you want. But most players don't to be fair.
Now onto the gameplay. The game is different from the board game, and it begins with 3 stages each turn. 1. Recruit. At the start of each turn, you get a minimum of 3 troops to distribute how you like, you get extra troops for owning more territories and continents. This is fine and works well, and is the same as the board game. 2. Attack. You then get to attack as many times on your turn as you like, if you conquer at least one territory you get a card, 3 cards can be traded in for more troops. Fine.
('ll address the 3rd stage, fortify, in a sec)
But in the board game, it's a choice, recruit OR attack. Meaning there's a trade-off, get more troops and get stronger, or conquer and get cards and territories, thus getting stronger that way. The issue with being allowed to do both is it creates repetitive and boring gameplay. Every turn everyone (assuming they're good players) will reinforce their position, attack at least one territory, usually a weak one, and then retreat. So everyone always has the same number of cards and everyone's troops grow together. I'd like to see attack OR recruit, not both.

1. Fortify. Another feature that creates boring gameplay. Fortify is moving as many troops from one territory to another once per turn, assuming the territories are connected (doesn't have to be next to but they can't move through other people's territories.) The issue with fortify is "stacking", where everyone puts all the troops on one territory. This then creates a massive wrecking ball that can easily conquer multiple territories in one turn assuming the territories it's conquering has a small number of troops on it. The big issue is it means evening distributing your territories is dumb, because big numbers trade with relatively smaller numbers really well, and so if 20 attacked a 5, 20 would most likely lose less than 5, so that 20 could attack multiple territories with 5 on. As a result everyone stacks. Now because everyone is stacking, it becomes a boring game of attack a weak territory, retreat, stack. Every turn. And the better the players, the more this is likely. And so I'd like fortify to be completely removed. A controversial opinion I'm sure.

So now onto the balance of the game. 1. Australasia. I know this is based on the board game, but this is different to the board game already anyway. But there need to be some balance changes IMO. Firstly, Australasia is far too strong of a continent. +2 per round with only one chokepoint whereas South America has two choke points but still only gets +2, and Africa that has 3 choke points and only gets +3. Furthermore, Australasia has access to Asia, an often uncontested continent for easy attacks and therefore easy card gain. This means the person who gets Australasia usually has the best chance of winning. So either buff South America to +3, and Africa to +4, or nerf Australasia to +1. (And maybe perhaps buff EU to +6 as it has 4 choke points to NA's 3?) 2. Reckless players A large part of the game, and how you win is waiting for other players to just wipe each other out. In an even 3 player game, if 2 of the 3 players attack each other, the 3rd player just wins usually. This is of course a large part of the game, but often some players will just do this to be an a$$hole. I've had players just suicide into me and then immediately leave for me to then lose. There should be some way to report and temp ban players like this. (This is also caused by stacking which is caused by the fortify feature) Which leads on to 3. 3. CPU. The CPU is terrible. If you play single player, even on the highest difficulty you'll see the CPU is very easy to beat. In a game with real players though, the CPU is reckless and always upsets the balance of the game by being far too aggressive and in a 3 player game with one being a CPU, the CPU often hands the win to one player by aggressively attacking the other player. I think if a player leaves, they should 1. not be allowed to rejoin and 2. a CPU should NOT take over, and instead the player just becomes AFK (no new troops, no attacking and no fortifying), because in this case, the other two players will just out grow the AFK and then easily destroy it and it will become a 1v1.
I appreciate these are some quite large changes I'm asking for but perhaps do a test run and let players vote on whether they like the changes? I mean I could be completely wrong in many areas but I'm just speaking from my experience of playing the game.
One thing I've realised while writing this review is I've only addressed one map, the main map but there are many other maps to play with custom settings. Though I only played the original map as it's the only way to play ranked. But I could complain about other features like blizzard but I'll stop here. :)
Overall 6.5/10. I would recommend but I'm not going to continue to play unless some of these issues get addressed. This could easily be my favourite game. So close but so far.

The results are in for Match 5. The winner is…
The Masters of Funky Action, with a score of 72 to Suburban Regalia‘s 64!

Category	Winner	Point Totals	Comments
Popularity	Masters of Funky Action	19-10	At 6.5 votes to 3.5, MFA took the lead early on and held onto it.
Quality	Suburban Regalia	20-21	Reasoning
JoJolity	Tie	23-23	Reasoning
Conduct	Tie	10-10

“Nngh… Gheh…” Lemon Demon couldn’t move much without hurting himself, and was beginning to black out as it was; Bert’s creations had been fended through, the pair had been separated, and he’d wound up tangled and chained up and unable to break free without some great risk to his own safety. Regardless, though, even slipping out of consciousness and feeling it, he kept up high spirits.
“Guess I’m beat… Guess this is some kinda karma. I always made phone cords so they get all tangled up on purpose… Whole design of the things was my idea.” He snickered a bit, turning his head as much as he could. “Okay, wanna help me down, Bert?”
The old troublemaker only heard silence back as his eyes shut.
“…Bert?”
Perseus Drakos and Casey Williams, standing at the bottom of the stairwell by the entrance to the basement room from which their opponents had come, were quiet, the older of the two putting a hand on the younger’s shoulder.
“Hey, Percy… Are you doing alright?”
“…why wouldn’t I be? We won… We beat a monster who killed tens of thousands. Got revenge for Rudolf…” Perseus answered, tone so even she couldn’t tell if he was forcing it or not, turning around and walking quickly towards the door, shrugging her hand away. “C’mon, we need to help those people still. They might still be alive.”
“…” Casey turned to watch him move, and didn’t let herself turn back towards the coffin of glass, which had been stuck with blade after blade and begun dripping something copper-scented all over the floor.
Whether he was being honest or not, Perseus was right. This mattered more.
The pair stepped into the trashed laboratory, unsurprised yet at once deeply concerned as they saw the bloodied forms of the University Board members laying there, large gashes in their heads, barely moving, at either side of some off-white mess in a pile of broken glass on the ground.
“They… They’re alive, for now, but… I don’t think they’ll last like this.” Casey expressed, trembling with her finger on the pulse of the restaurant’s owner. “We… Were we too late? Even fighting as fast as we could, were we too late?!”
“No, there…” Perseus’ voice cracked slightly. “There has to be something we can-” He paused, then, the Stranger guiding his attention to the ‘weapon’ on the ground.
Something the size of a ping-pong ball had begun to emerge from it.
There’s only a few hours left, meanwhile, to vote in the round’s first boss match, wherein a returning T3 character faces an ant-controlling boy and a shocking Kamen Rider!
Scenario:
Downtown Los Fortuna, The Capital Islets - Near City Hall
Council Chairperson Raymond Delwyn Shimizu was in about as good a mood as he could be, given the troubling circumstances. The city and everyone in it was in danger, and one of his closest allies here was currently on a dangerous mission to take down the entire leadership of the city’s most prominent crime rings, and still, petty bullshit, feuds and backroom deals and councilmen in people’s pockets continued to stand in the way of his efforts.
Nonetheless, he could not wear a worried face before the smiles and trust of the people he’d come to represent, let alone as he read over a speech that he’d slaved over just for today, for the latest anniversary of the city’s founding. It was a miracle of his legislative work that the islets had managed to be in enough of a state of repair to house any event at all, let alone as beloved as this one.
“That Andrew Tiffany fellow unveiled our city’s new flag at one of these foundational celebrations, couple years back.” A short, goggle-wearing guy with a red aviator cap spoke to Ray, and he regarded him unsuspiciously, as in spite of his comparable costume to certain ghosts around the city, the mayor of the town, unlike them, had a very large, prominent handlebar moustache covering up half of his face. “My first foundational celebration in office, that was… The mayor before me had just resigned after his jaywalking ring was exposed to the public by a clout-chasing whistleblower.”
Ray nodded, agreeing that such a thing, of course, was deeply scandalous, wholly deserving of a replacement by Mayor Rockin Red Robin. “I can tell you’ve inherited a lot of pressure… Especially needing to hunt down the Red Flying Man. I didn’t know you were the type to take action like that…”
“Of course, of course!” Mayor Red waved his hand, then, “in general, I think I must take my post more seriously, I’ve realized, especially having lost a brace of kinsmen myself to the tragedies of late. Tell you what, even… Add an addendum to your speech, that I’ve agreed to plan to get one of those ‘squads’ you want together, after this is done. I don’t flout my clout enough!”
“You… You mean that?” Would it be that easy? Would Ray have yet another of his campaign promises, the hardest he’d fought futilely for, officially realized?
“Certainly! So long as no abrupt scandals derail my entire political career, I should be very comfortably in a place to do so! No ulterior motives whatsoever! Only benevolence in this alliance!”
“Any last-minute setup you need done, Mr. Chairman? Mayor Red?”
The pair, then, looked to a tall teenaged temp they’d hired to help arrange for things, who wore a big beanie cap all the way down over his eyes… Thorburn, he’d said he was, and Ray, humoring the eccentric, accepted that for the sake of being a nice guy.
“Not that I know of…” He answered, looking around, then to the giant screens affixed to the outer walls of City Hall; climbing as well as he could, this volunteer had gotten them all installed easily. “Thanks, though. You’ve been as much help as half a dozen men or more… Uh. Maybe see if Golden Week needs anything?”
“Sure, yeah… That sounds fine. I’ll definitely do that.” Thorburn walked away, then, turning back a moment to conclude, “this commemoration… It’s going to be one to remember. Looking forward to the main event.”
“…” Ray wasn’t sure what to make of that, but before he could ask, the volunteer was gone. “Uh… Looks like it’s about time to get started. Wish me luck.”
As Ray stepped up, then, turning the mic on, he cleared his throat, earning the attention of the murmuring crowds as either hand rested on either side of the podium.
“Good afternoon, Los Fortuna. I am… Deeply humbled, that we have managed to get the former Capital Island in enough of a state of repair to host this event here once more, and would like to start with thanks to the relief and repair workers still spending hours on the islets every day.” He paused to allow the crowd to applaud, then opened his mouth again. “These first months as your council chairman have been-”
Royalty free music began to blare overtop itself in a discordant overlap, drowning out the interrupted words of the beginnings of Ray’s speech as the screens which had been displaying him to the crowd, suddenly, began to display static, then a form framed in silhouette.
“Hello, to everyone tuning in online and in-person,” the figure said, voice distorted and lowered several octaves digitally, “it’s your favorite and least favorite web personality, your best and your worst friend, here to steal the show!”
Several bumps began to emerge from the ground beneath Ray and other councillors waiting to speak, prompting them to tactically retreat from the gradually forming horned, mechanical-looking orbs with glowing green eyes which had begun to overtake the area.
“What the hell is going on..?”
Ray winced on his bad leg, then, before a much larger variant of the same, brighter in color, grabbed and tossed him into the soft grass. Amazingly, he landed harmlessly.
“Forget about all those corrupt jerks, just here to talk about themselves, alright? Talking about them is why I’M here.”
A Small House Just East of the Capital Islets, the Evening Before
Ever since she had suddenly awoken in Los Fortuna, Evelyn Ensanar had never once set foot outside of her home.
It had been…
Hell, how long had it been? Days had become weeks had become months, all within these walls and roof, and that would turn into lord knew how long. Wild. It's insane how big numbers can get.
Something tapped against the window.
It was a nice neighborhood they’d wound up in, her mother had optimistically said. The neighbors were friendly, and had a girl her age, and the school district was one of the better you could find in the urban area. She could start high school on a fresh note, with ‘good’ friends, and not just sit in front of a bunch of screens in a shuttered room, making more and more of an Evelyn-shaped impression in that ergonomic lounge chair she’d spent so much time in.
Yeah, mom.
Something tapped against the window.
Even as the island just West literally collapsed into pieces by some Stand Users’ hands, as the ground beneath her quaked, Evelyn couldn’t bring herself to go outside, and by some hand of fate, the place wasn’t destroyed; the security she’d installed over the months worked like a charm at keeping it floodproof, earthquake-proof, and most importantly, the lights plugged in and wi-fi working. That oh-so-nice high school was leveled and underwater without Evelyn even having bothered to google it.
Now the city was doomed to fall or whatever, everyone was gonna die if nothing was done, and while many others sprung into action, the fourteen year-old was as stagnant as the air in the room littered with posters of aliens and spaceships and electronics and their wirings strewn about the floor, waiting for their turn to be dusted off and tested out again.
Something tapped against the window.
It was a nice welcoming room, a welcoming room, if a bit dark. But hey, wasn’t that why electronics electronics were there, to lighten things up? Evelyn tried to part the messy blue bangs out of her eye, but it fell back into place immediately as she turned to chug another can of Forbidden Dew, jiggling her neon wireless mouse to put her screensaver to rest, revealing her cluttered desktop.
She wondered why she’d ever tried to live any other way in the first place. School was hell, and like hell, the gates were shut; people no matter how different or similar to her would forget her anyway. Even then, she’d tried time and time again to make the impossible work. God… I was so cringe back then. She was so miserable.
Something tapped against the window.
She looked towards the shuttered windows again, at the last vestiges of twilight fading through. It was funny, no, fucking hilarious, how that window had once shown nothing but city lights, but now, things were dim and half-sunk even when it was open. In the end, no matter how hard you try, everything leads to ‘Nothing’ in the end…
For Evelyn, however, it hadn’t been that way for a while. She’d broken past the boundaries that once corralled her, found a way in which she could be a part of a society she wanted, a pillar of it, never to be forgotten. To my viewers, to my fans, I’m an icon, someone admirable… Someone I can be my true self for, a world where I don’t have to fear any kind of fall. I’m a famous, popular creator to them! I am someone who matters… I need to act like that, don’t I? But… with everything going on… The end literally months away… I really need to snap out of this rut. I need to stay *me.***
CRASH!
A big, heavy rock flew through Evelyn’s window, something rubber-banded to it, and though she jumped in place and cursed under her breath, it was with a breathy sort of laugh while quickly assessing that it was absolutely not a bomb or something else. Just a ‘prank.’ She looked out to see who could be responsible, but felt like she’d only noticed a sort of glimmer in her eye, before turning towards the object in question.
Rubber banded to the rock was a bulky-looking manila folder, bearing the logo of that, uh… Church of Syrinx, she thought it was called? She didn’t pay much attention to them. Looked stolen, especially as she turned the rock over and saw a message painted onto it in neon.
NOT YOUR ENEMY, JUST SOMEONE WHO WANTS THINGS TO MOVE FORWARD
TALK AFTER STREAM. ONE REQUEST IN EXCHANGE FOR THIS
And then, it was signed with an emoji… One which made Evelyn chuckle to see.
How the hell did this guy fit that all onto one side of a rock? Well, whoever it was knew where she lived, so she supposed humoring this, talking to this stone age weirdo, was her best bet…
And no reason not to open up the folder in the meantime, looking its contents over. It was a collection of documents all stamped and labeled ‘CITY HALL.’
“‘Councilman Golden Week, Downtown District…’” She tilted her head, pulling more of the contents out. “‘Died months ago, replaced by another Stand User?’ ‘Ties to violent anarchist organizations?’” That made her chuckle, grin. “Based.”
From there, then, she thumbed over the contents, speed-reading every entry. Affairs, insider trading dirt, terrorism complicency… There was a veritable goldmine of blackmail material that had just literally been thrown through her window, all on the ‘good’ people at City Hall.
“There was that thing out there tomorrow, right?” She spoke to herself, looking out the destroyed window towards the sunken, half-rebuilt islets.
Already, an idea was starting to form. Evelyn would make her mark on history yet again. But she couldn’t get ahead of herself, of course. She had a stream to get underway, and someone to thank later. Her recording software was up and running, and for the audience, a figure in an astronaut helmet appeared onscreen, a text-to-speech voice accompanying speech bubbles emerging by the avatar’s side.

good evening fans and haters and five yr olds
it me
looks like we finally hit 100k subs. just happened 2day dont say otherwise. U alllllllllll know what that means right
tomorrow, (REAL) face reveal stream. i have some thing xtra special planned for it just u wait and see
all day tomorrow after noon. tell ur friends. it will b some thing new 4 me, and it, i promise, will be
epic

In high spirits, eagerly awaiting what would come next and planning already in their mind, UltraNebula67 proceeded to have one of the best evening streams they felt they’d had in a long time.
Downtown Los Fortuna, the Next Morning - En Route to Capital Island
Espiritu was not a fan of crowds, or of events. It was all noise, and content, and people hoping to speak their platforms in ways which belied their intentions. In Los Fortuna, it would always mean that there were so many more people than anywhere else he’d been whose sins he would see carried upon their backs, thinking nothing of how they would have to some day answer for what clung to them so fearsomely.
This city is the dead… I am as well.
Much had been on the jaguar’s mind in recent days… That Worm, he had taken something which Espiritu had valued dearly, a remnant of the only thing to truly ever be like him which had been stolen from him. He had taken and threatened one of the few people in this world who had known how to find it, and now, horrible loss had come. Failure, for Espiritu, was certain. Death would come.
Yet he walked towards City Hall with discomfort in his every step.
A message had been written in neon on the side of the Estate early that morning, as he’d come back from attempting to exercise, to find some sign of where the man might have taken the memento known as Golden State.

TODAY AT CITY HALL
MEN WILL BE RUINED
WILL YOU LET THEM?

As he read over those words, Espiritu felt as if he was being watched, heard a rustling in the grassy forests of the island.
This wasn’t a warning, then. It was an ultimatum. Somebody was calling him out, meant to drag him in front of the city for whatever purpose was running through their mind… Over the well-being of people whose lives meant nothing to him, whose suffering he could not even begin to give a damn about if he wanted to.
He would make his way out there as soon as he could.
“Oh shit, hey, what’s up?”
Espiritu was distracted from his thoughts on the matter by the teenaged voice cutting in to question his presence. Sitting on a bench close to the epicenter of the speech, half-watching the council chairman speak to somebody or another and plan it out, was the strawberry blonde biker known as ‘Lou’ Reed, sitting and having Wrenn Aflight, disguised only with a big scarf over his face’s lower half, lean into her shoulder slightly.
They seemed to be doing well, regardless of the grudges clinging to their backs, and Espiritu needed more information.
“You… Hello, yes. I am here for an important reason. I’ve received a warning that ‘something’ would happen to ‘ruin’ the men here, if I did not appear. Have you found what you said you would?”
It was a matter unrelated to Espiritu’s presence here, and Lou shook her head. “I’m working on it… And hell, maybe we’re looking into the same thing. Mostly I’m here so Wedding March fanboys don’t start trashing the place and demanding they reinstall their guy just because he died and came back.” She smiled softly, then, adding, “I doubt they’ll try anything, but honestly… I’d almost like to see them try, just gimme the excuse, you know?”
“That does not sound like what I am looking into.” Espiritu continued speaking through his Stand, looking to the idol next. “A message was spray-painted onto the Estate, by somebody nimble. Do you know anything about where your ally is? If he knows anything about it?”
“You mean Bang?” Wrenn tilted his head. “Tell the truth, I haven’t talked to him much at all the past few days! He’s been running around doing this, that, this other thing, and I haven’t been able to keep track of it… If I thought it was important, I’d try, though!”
“You two are no help, then,” Espiritu remarked, not resenting it, but not wanting to stick around long if he didn’t need to, either. He liked one of the two people present here, and the other had similar amounts of grudges to himself, but he would not waste his time here.
He began to walk away, then, the companionship between the two meaning little to him.
“If something happens, let me know.”
Before he could investigate any further, however, robotic-looking things began to emerge from the ground, round, and bumpy, and charging people, pushing them yet not seeming to hurt them, and Espiritu ran and ran away, desperate even more now to find what was going on.
Horrible, discordant noises were blaring, and a new, shadowed face appeared on the screens which had been displaying Raymond Delwyn Shimizu’s speech.
“Hello, to everyone tuning in online and in-person,” the figure said, voice distorted and lowered several octaves digitally, “it’s your favorite and least favorite web personality, your best and your worst friend, here to steal the show!”
More people were thrown, yet none harmed.
“Forget about all those corrupt jerks, just here to talk about themselves, alright? Talking about them is why I’M here.”
“Are you alright, chairman?!” Mayor Red helped Ray up with surprising strength, dusting him off and looking things over.
“Yeah… Just surprised a bit. If these are Stand constructs, their power is surprisingly low. Virtually indestructible, though…”
“I’m here for multiple reasons, really… The first, of course, is to celebrate my own milestones as a creator and community head! That’s right! UltraNebula67 has broken the 100k subscriber milestone! I just needed to do something special for that, right?”
A chat sidebar appeared on the side of the silhouetted screens, showcasing the series of emojis representing the viewers’ joy at this, as well as many talking about a face reveal or asking what the hell was being played.
“Rather than using my avatar for this… I’m going to make a face reveal, and explain today’s stream, the greatest pranks I’ve pulled yet, as myself! Are you hype? Get hype! Okay! Alright! Hyper! More hype! Okay, just a little less hype… Little more! Okay!” Nebula’s shadowy hand held up a remote, and they began to count down, voice growing less and less distorted, “in five… four… three… two..!”
The lights in the room came on dramatically then, and all were able to see the iconic streamer’s face for the first time, grinning in a sure, confident way as their blue hair looked quite natural rested with bangs covering up one eye.
Though they didn’t know to call them Evelyn, the world could see the teenaged girl behind Nebula for the first time.
(art by crimsonRedscarlet!)
This… This problem is being caused by a child? Of course it is. Espiritu was unsurprised, even if he knew that he wasn’t exactly a boomer himself.
For a single, shy moment, Nebula’s hand waved, with a little “hey..!” in a lower voice than the previous grandstanding, before she gulped, nodded, and narrowed her visible eye, grinning and raising her voice again. “It’s great to finally show my face to the world, and I couldn’t have picked a better special stream to do it! See, not only have I, as you can see, had these ‘minions’ of mine take over the steps in front of City Hall, but I even have a reason to!” A lofty folder full of documents was pulled into Nebula’s hands, ushered in by a cascade of air horns. “Things to be said about everyone here, councillors and mayors and DAs, oh my! All leaked to me by a great new friend!”
“Just to let you know I’m not kidding, let’s start with a ‘freebie,’ to show this stuff means business! To the guy no longer in office, the man who claimed to be pro-safety and was murdered anyway, then came back when nobody asked him to, Wedding March!” Documentation of the former Council Chairman filled the screen, as well as photos of his middle-aged face, transactional records indicating exactly what Nebula was about to say.
“That necromancied old-timer had been blocking so many reforms for the city, all because he’d been taking tons of under-the-table payments from Ugo McBaise’s VALKYRIE to set up the table for a private police force basically replacing the already-pretty-garbo police! He was even starting to fund his reelection bid! Talk about CRINGE, am I right? Now, a lot of these aren’t quite that, we’ve got affairs, embarrassing secrets, old photos, all of it spicy, and I’ve saved some of the absolute nastiest for later!”
“Is she just… Leaking corruption stuff?” Wrenn tilted his head, his own Stand beginning to recall where a moment ago he’d been trying to fight. “That sounds fine actually! I think she’s just doing this to get into the drama sphere, but people should be punished for that kinda stuff!”
“Honestly… Nobody’s been hurt yet, just shoved around.” Lou, too, stood down, slightly, a little amused, if anything. “Fuck it, sure. I’m along for the ride… What’s the endgame with all these gaming enemy robot things?”
“I’ve watched her streams before…” Wrenn admitted. “I thought her Stand ability was clicking on stuff and making it stop.”
“Now, I know what some of you longterm fans are thinking… ‘I thought their Stand ability was clicking on stuff and making it stop!’” Nebula threw her head back, laughing and waving a mouse around. “That’s just something this mouse can do, I’ll have you know! My Stand isn’t just defined by a weird new way to play ‘cookie clicker!’ No, no, by now you’ve noticed all those enemies from Iconic Video Game roaming around, just bumping into or throwing guys in their way… This, and how it created my usual avatar, are my REAL ability!”
“That’s right, this is a Stand reveal, too!” Pogchamps resembling Nebula’s avatar filled the chatbar, and Nebula revealed a pair of VR glasses-looking things, flipping them over her head. “This… Is ‘Wind of Fjords!’ I can connect to any alternate reality through this, any medium, and within a few hours, raise up anything from it I want! Though if I can’t control it myself, it has a mind of my own… I’m not controlling those bullying baddies down there, even if I did queue them up last night, for the record! But they aren’t the only thing I’ve summoned up, either.”
She was making this into a game. Espiritu was more and more appalled.
“See, much as I love the info in here… I’m not a drama channel. I’m a gamer at heart, someone who loves to play games, to really get involved with the community instead of just talking at people! So I’ve decided, since you know I’m not bluffing, whether or not all of this stuff gets leaked, is going to DEPEND now on a ‘game.’”
The mayor looked deeply concerned, there, and Raymond stood up a bit, looking to aides. “Find where they’re streaming from… I want to have a chat with this kid.”
A cheap-looking 3D model of a videogame card key spun around on the centralmost screen, the other two occupied by the 2D sprites which nonetheless successfully rotated and existed in 3D space. “That bad boy is what I call the ‘data key…’ It’s a device I made up and wrote a whole short story about, and you know what its power is? Its power is that if someone is holding onto it after I start a five minute countdown, they get to decide if the leak goes through and the whole online gets these notes or not! And right here, right now… It’s IN someone’s possession, at that very site! You’ll be able to identify them by a little triangle rotating above their head. And it has this weird little glitch where it just leaks everything automatically if more than two people are fighting for it at one-”
“I’ll explain from here.” Another voice chimed in, audible on the stream; this one was definitely masculine.
The crowd murmured and looked around, only for someone - the volunteer, Thorburn, in his big beanie cap - to rush out into the middle of the enemies in his waiter-looking outfit, then dramatically toss his disguise away, revealing shockingly to the world the distinctive hair and sleeveless outfit of Bang “Boogie” Bronson.
A triangular shape was rotating above his head, and a microphone was in his hand, which he spoke into, then, gazing out into the crowd as the streaming screen split to focus on both his face and Evelyn’s.
“You came here… I know you did. So why haven’t you come out yet?”
Everyone was silent, then. Almost everyone was confused, but one member of the crowd knew exactly who was being addressed.
“You have about five minutes now… You know that, don’t you? If you don’t steal this from me… We’re going to put things out that ruin basically everyone in city hall. And sure, most deserve that, but… It doesn’t make a g-goddamn difference to me, win or lose, whatever happens. What matters is that *you fight for it, tooth and nail.”***
…
…
Bang hung his head, shutting his eyes. “I see… So in the end, you can’t do it. Y-you talk big about taking control, but you’re hopeless… You don’t think it’s worth it at all.”

PRESUMPTUOUS!

A TTS device, different from Nebula’s usual, rang through the arena quite loudly, everyone confused and murmuring about who to send in, if they should bother at all, until the source came through; it was a fucked up-looking jaguar with a cell phone, the latter of which speaking words in tandem with his Stand emoting them.
“These people, these councillors… They mean nothing to me, and I do not want them in charge of me. Most could not care less. They will be weighed by what they have done for a long, long time.” Espiritu stepped closer, then, more and more of a disgusted look in his eye. “What you, and this… GAMER, have done, it is not justice. It is not even a test… You are acting solely to disrupt, solely for yourselves, and feeling important. It’s despicable, with what we’re on the verge of. With what is going to kill us in here.”
“WHOA! AN ENTIRE JAGUAR HAS STEPPED INTO THE RING, CHAT! BANG “BOOGIE” BRONSON IS GONNA BE FIGHTING A JAGUAR FOR THIS!” Nebula sounded genuinely excited, trying not to let the terrible and apt words get to her. This was going to be amazing.
“Espiritu…” Bang couldn’t help but smile, bouncing back and forth on his heels and tilting his head. “If you think so, th-then put a stop to it. I want to see you try… I want you to put everything you’ve got into this.”
“This is a waste of time. Nobody else is even bothering to join in, it is so much a waste of time.” Espiritu concluded, preparing a stance to make a movement. “Five minutes… You won’t last that against me.”
Bang bounced a spray paint can in his hand. “That’s the spirit.”
Nebula, then, made sure several airhorns blared at once, calling out…
“OPEN THE GAME!”
Location: Downtown, in front of City Hall. The area here is 75 by 85 meters with each tile being 5 by 5 meters. Espiritu starts on the left center and Bang is on the right center as represented by their respective character tokens.
The yellow tiles are cobblestone walkways, with the darker yellow tiles being the sidewalk that borders the road represented by grey tiles. On the road, there are parked cars represented by the purple rectangles, naturally these cars are locked.
The green dotted rectangles are designated greenery zones and each have shrubs and small thin trees inside them. They also each have a lamppost as represented by the yellow “X” marked circles, each lamppost is 5 meters tall.
At the top center is the City Hall Building, in the center of it is a podium and the lined part of it is the stairs leading up to the upper foundation represented by the main grey rectangle. The upper foundation is 3 meters tall. The columns supporting the front of the building are 5 meters tall, and while the entrance to city hall is visibly represented by the rounded rectangle, it is not enterable for this match.
There are several entities here created by Nebula’s Stand Ability and they come in two varieties. They are represented by the 12 red square faces and the 6 blue square faces and will be gone over in more detail below. Both types of entities are vaguely humanoid creatures and it’s pretty clear that they must be from some type of video game.
Goal: Be the one with the Data Key at the end of 5 minutes!
Additional Information:
The Data Key is not a physical entity, it is a program that attaches itself to a host. While inside a host a holographic triangle icon will appear above the host’s head. Outside of a host it looks like a floating pixel art key in a .25 diameter translucent bubble. While floating, the key will float slowly towards the center of the map, one meter off the ground at a slow walking pace. It is also not physically tangible to walls and objects, but will bind itself to the player that touches it.
In order to knock the Data Key out of a host, they must be attacked by one of Nebula’s entities mentioned above, more detail below on specifics. But if a person with the Data Key is attacked by another person directly, say with a punch or anything really that causes pain or injury, the Data Key will transfer itself to the attacker.
At the start of the match Bang will be the one with the Data Key.
The Red Entities are known as Chargers and as their name implies they will run at you and knock the Data Key out of you on impact if you have it. They have C Power, C Speed, and A Durability. Their charge is very much like a football tackle and meant to knock the target over. They have a 30 meter aggro range from their starting position and will detect and go after players in that range. They will prioritize whoever’s closer. If they are 30 meters away from their starting position or there is no target in aggro range, they will make their way back to the starting position until they aggro on something within range again.
The Blue Entities are known as Chucks and as their name implies they will grab and throw whatever they get their hands on at full power. If you have the Data Key on you, it will get left behind where the Chuck is as you get tossed. They have A Power, C Speed, and A Durability. They have the same aggro principles and detection as the Red Entities and when a player is in grab range, they will initiate a two handed grab and toss on whatevewhoever they manage to catch. They also seem to have impeccable aim and will always throw things to the farthest away greenery area. Except the two on the road, those two will throw you towards the roof of City Hall that is visible on the map.

Team	Combatant	JoJolity
Masters of Funky Action	Bang “Boogie” Bronson	“Face forward, don't attack me! It's not gonna hit, anyway!” You are not worried about these things at all, in fact you can make use of these things too. Use Nebula’s Stand Entities here to your advantage!
Black Hill Estate	Espiritu del Alocatlal	“Great misfortune is on its way here.” Well since these things will be getting in both your ways, maybe they could be useful to you. Use Nebula’s Stand Entities here to your advantage!

Link to the Official Player Spreadsheet
Link to Match Schedule
As always, if you would like to interact with the tournament community and be among the first to get updates for the tournament, please feel free to PM a member of our Judge staff for an invite to our Official Discord Server!

A very important edit:
Please see this recent post. I recommended Polish PickUp (PPU) and a few other brands in the comments, but this was before all the shit surrounding PPU and other brands came out.
There are still many good indie nail polish brands that aren't racist/homophobic/etc and work towards representation, but...beware.
TW for ableism
Some Terminology and Disclaimers
Indie nail polish: Small batch nail polishes created by small companies. Due to the size of the companies—sometimes just an one-person-show—creators, fan group admins, and swatchers are strongly associated with their brand, and bad behavior can easily besmirch the company. See here for a more in-depth explanation.
Names of individuals have been changed for obvious reasons. The swatcher in question is still somewhat active, and I don’t want to give her any publicity.
We’re also mostly American and thus perceive c*nt (or "c u next tuesday") to be an offensive and gendered term.
With all of that out of the way…
The #MutantThumbs
‘Megan Fox’ thumbs: Thumbs with tiny nail beds, from a genetic condition called brachydactyly type D. Termed as such because Megan Fox is a famous figure who has them. You might have seen people joke about how they’re not "into" Megan Fox “because of her thumbs”. Well, this is what they’re talking about.
Swatcher: Someone hired to put on and photograph upcoming nail polish collections (called a “press release”). A swatch is a picture of someone wearing a polish on their nails, as opposed to painting a piece of paper or a bottle shot. An accurate swatch means that the pictures correctly represent the nail polish. It is possible to have beautiful but inaccurate swatches (eg: Live Love Polish, who is disliked for this and many other reasons in the community). Most brands hire multiple swatchers so that they can have a variety of skin tones, finger types, and lighting to showcase their polishes.
(I used ‘hired’ lightly. Many swatchers receive nothing but polish in exchange for their hours of editing and photography. It’s also tiring on the hands, since nail polish remover is drying. Cosmetic Sanctuary, a huge swatcher, goes through three bottles of top coat and tons of acetone additive (added to make nail polish remover less drying) every time she swatches the Polish Pickup Polishes.)
In May 2019, a well-known swatcher—let’s call her Ashley—posted a meme of a “Megan Fox” thumb on her Instagram story with the caption “If your thumb nail looks like this then please don’t talk to me *eye roll emoji*”. On top of the meme, she added her own words: “Seriously. So gross. #mutantthumbs.”
This seems fairly innocuous as far as offensive content goes. People nail shame all the time, after all. So what’s the difference? Well, it’s one thing to make fun of someone’s nail shape or polish decisions, since those are personal choices. (Nail shape: how people trim the ends of their nails.) But you can’t control how your thumbs grow, because you’re born with it.
People were fairly nice about it at first, DMing her to ask if it was a joke and to educate her about brachydactyly. And instead of a “I’m sorry; I didn’t know, this is in poor taste, and I’ll take it down,” they received a “my page & I post whatever I want.”
If she were just another internet edgelord, it would have ended here. But at the time, Ashley was working with a ton of brands. She was even a swatcher of the month at one point for Polish Pickup, a huge monthly indies exclusives shop. Given the small and intimate nature of nail world, a brand would be perceived to condone Ashley’s actions if they continued using her. [Edit: Just to clarify, some makers will dig their heels in and stick with problematic swatchers.]
And so her Instagram story and private responses made their way to a certain nail polish Facebook group with a “no screenshots policy”.
The A Plot: Ashley Goes Scorched Earth
OP posted pictures of Ashley’s Instagram story and her response to DMs. The intent was to inform brands of her behavior, so that they could cut ties with her if they wanted to. Many—not all—makers were/are in this FB group.
Keep in mind that it was not too late for Ashley to apologize. If she made a cursory but genuine statement saying that she was ignorant and that her remarks were offensive, the thread would have ended at the 200 comment mark. Of course, she would still get some flack, but it’d be manageable, a chance for self-improvement and education.
Instead, Ashley:

• Posted a gif of a crying child with Down’s Syndrome.
• Laugh-reacted to people recounting how self-conscious they were/are of their short thumbs, and how they were bullied for them in childhood.
• Went off about how she wasn’t even that interested in polish anymore when someone told her indie brands were in the group, and could see her responses. (Never mind that her Instagram was highly active.)
• Gloated that brands knew who she was, and were okay with it.

Spoiler alert: they were not okay with it.
At least six brands commented on the thread that they were sickened by her actions and dropping her ASAP. Some announced their decision in their fangroups as well. One maker worked in disabilities advocacy for her day job and was especially disgusted. Others had personal experiences with being ridiculed for their nails.
The thread in general was a hot mess. Most people were horrified with Ashley, but quite a few people, mostly her friends, were upset with the original poster. “Two wrongs don’t make a right,” they claimed, and OP was just as bad as Ashley were stirring up sh*t. As if making terrible remarks was equivalent to calling them out. They also started speculating about OP’s mental health: “She needs to get a life; sounds like she needs a hug!”
At this point, we all expected Ashley to you know, take a break from social media so that she could come back the next day and claim she was hacked, or post a lackluster apology in an attempt to salvage some of her former reputation.
Nope.
In the midst of makers dropping Ashley like a hot potato, a few suspect polishes started showing up in Ashley’s destash. To be specific, these were unreleased polishes that hadn’t even been formally unveiled yet, much less on the market.
Now, let me get this straight. Most of the community are fine with swatchers selling their press releases. It’s not really “free polish” if you have to work hours for it. Though corporate brands have very strict rules about selling PR (tl;dr: don’t sell, or you’ll get blacklisted), the community and brands are usually chill as long as 1) you’re not flipping things and 2) destashes don’t overlap with the official selling period. The advertising and photos they provide is more than worth the cost of the polish itself.
In other words, selling polishes before they were even revealed is a big no-no. It was clear that despite her middle fingers up, “IDGAF” attitude, Ashley knew she was done for. She was going full scorched earth now.
Fortunately, the illicitly destashing was resolved. The admin of the FB group, who also does swatching and is affiliated with many brands, DMed Ashley and purchased all the unreleased polishes so that they would not spoiled.
Unfortunately, nothing else was resolved.
Somewhere around the 800 comment mark, Ashley’s “husband” made a cameo. I use air quotes, because her husband posted that wall of text, filled with “c*nt”-calling, through her account. Did he really log on to scream at Internet strangers, or did Ashley enjoy referring to herself as “my wife”? The world will never know.
He claimed people were just “misreading” the meme. It wasn’t actually about thumb size or genetic disorders, because nowhere were any of those things mentioned! Nope, it was just about how a fingernail…was cut too short, and now his wife was being “bullied” and “attacked” despite working “countless hours” for the community.
Also, there was nothing wrong with her responses. None at all. How would you feel, he asked, if women halfway across the world “accused you of something you didn’t do and started a [sic] public shaming”? Furthermore, he claimed, all those brands that “dumped” her “sided with the bullies” and “lost a friend and a hard worker”.
Never mind that Ashley’s original Instagram story was screenshotted (including her own commentary and responses over DM), and her horrid responses were crystal clear in the thread if you just scrolled up a bit.
We expressed doubts that…he was actually her husband, and not just you know, her pretending. Her “husband’s” response? He accused one member of being jealous that she couldn’t find a great, handsome husband like him.
That member did have a husband. One in poor health, whom she took care of lovingly.
The only person who believed it was really her husband posting was one of her friends who had been defending her all along. The friend told the “husband” to give Ashley her phone back so they could chat. Perhaps it was a last-ditch effort to save face for the swatcher.
Oh, but there was no going back. Ashley’s ‘husband’ was not done. He was out to make his wife the victim and ruin any last vestige of dignity she had.
He went on and on about how this had nothing to do with ableism or swatching. No, it was all about fake friends. Ashley wasn’t ableist. He had wide thumbs, and she still banged him. (But, he clarified, his nails weren’t short. She probably wouldn’t bang him if they were.)
And people wouldn’t be picking on her or her kids if they actually knew her. She was a great mother, and her daughters are in the top of their class, “because she’s a stay at home mom”.
Never mind that no one said anything about her kids. We don’t pick on kids.
The icing on the cake was his comment that “there’s a special place in hell for bullies and people who pick on handicapped people.”
In the meantime, Ashley posted a follow-up on her Instagram story. “Still fucking funny,” she said. “Hi crybaby c*nts!!” in reference to anyone from the FB group who was peeping her profile.
The B Plot: Aaand She’s Not Even a Good Swatcher…
Amidst the “husband” running amok, someone said, “Hey, isn’t that the lady whose swatches are consistently off?”
You’d think such an acclaimed swatcher would have great pictures. Well, it depends on how you define great.
Ashley’s swatches were certainly aesthetically beautiful. But they all had this strange blue glow to them, and the actual polishes looked nothing like she claimed, even though her bottle shots were fairly accurate. Discussion among community members led to the consensus that this glow was an artifact of the iPhone camera, one that misrepresented polishes and were carefully edited out.
Here are a series of comparisons. The top picture in each image is Ashley’s weirdly blue nail swatch; the bottom image is her true-to-color bottle shot. Here is a direct comparison of her swatch (top) to another more accurate depiction (bottom).
Of course, there’s always some room for error in swatching. Different screens show different colors. But that there was such a persistent blue shimmer, even when the polish had none at all, was clearly a systemic error.
It turned out that the amazing but ableist swatcher was just well, ableist.
Coda
Despite claiming that she wasn’t that into polish anyways, Ashley still posts to her Instagram. She has a healthy heaping of followers. Nail polish world continued on, new problematic people and brands coming and going like my attention span.
Once upon a time, Ashley’s swatches were inescapable. Every release, every collection, was sure to have a beautiful but inaccurate blue-tinted photo.
It’s safe to say that those days are long gone.
Edit: cropped the swatches to get rid of some info.